My Place of Peace

The Aroma of Grace

2012-01-11T15:39:00.001-08:00

We’re back on Highway 2, the same road I’ve taken to the city and home for seventeen years. This time more than a quick trip to the city, we’ve crossed several state lines and driven a dozen hours to get back to the familiar. Back to the rolling hills laden with ripening wheat. The red barns. The roads named after farmers long gone, whose land still feeds and clothes their sons and grandsons.

Though they mark our nearness to home, I hardly give them thought. Hardly realize that I’m watching for Zeimer Road, now that we’ve passed Janett Road. I’m so fixed on getting out of the car, that I don’t really appreciate it all.

And then slowly my subconscious wakes up and I notice. It smells like home. I take a deep breath of the earthy, late summer smell. The smell of wheat turning to gold. The smell of land well loved.

I look over to my husband, weary chauffer, “You smell that?” I ask. “Smells like home.” He nods that it does. I smile. Home. I hardly know a word as pleasing.

But before we know it we’re pulling in to the garage and unloading suitcases and I’m doing laundry and feeding souls and life is back to it’s normal rhythm.

That is, until the next time I’m on my way home from the city. This time I’m alone, lost in my thoughts. I pass the Grange Hall where the straight as an arrow road finally bends.

Not a mile later, I smell it again. The familiar. The smell of home. I smile and think how much I love this place.

Then I realize, it’s ten miles sooner that I drink it in today. And I wonder, was I really so oblivious a few days earlier? Why hadn’t I noticed? Had it really taken my subconscious ten miles to wake me up? I’m vaguely bothered by the inclination.

My discomfort grows. I’m face to face with the fact that too often I sleep with my eyes open, blind to the glorious beauty of the mundane. Deaf to the miraculous melodies in the familiar. And worst of all, oblivious to the aroma of grace. I journey miles and miles without breathing it sweet.

And I know then, that just like the smell of home lingered in the air for ten miles before I finally woke up to it, His grace is all around me, abounding. It’s always there, even when all I breathe is the stale car air of the mundane.

The smell of grace hangs in the air, waiting to nourish, comfort and thrill. His blessings abound. And I, for one, never want to return to shallow breathing but instead daily partake of the wondrous aroma of grace.

Continuing the count:

1229. Sitting through an entire sermon

1273. Waves crashing, hearts talking

1301. The smell of home

1311. A year without any major health crises

1312. Baby girl on the way!

1324. Those who encouraged me to start writing again

1352. Sons reading Frog & Toad

1355. Pink and purple sunrises

The Meager Few

2012-01-06T21:08:00.001-08:00

^Photo

Three. The meager number of times I posted here in 2011. Once to tell you I have MS. Once to share the blessed suffering of acceptance of said disease. And finally, once to tell you I was back to blogging (which I obviously was not) and share how thankfulness changes our perspective, making beautiful to us things that once seemed undesirable.

So much left out. Such a gap of understanding between us. 2011 was surely more than was represented here. I lament that. I grieve that I did not do the work of discovering and testifying to God’s sufficiency in every circumstance (that’s what writing is for me). And I regret that I did not share it with you who have been so kind to me and who, for some reason, still come back here, still think this place is worth keeping. Over and over God has used you to confirm that there is a gift that needs to be fanned to flame. Thank you.

I’m not making any promises for 2012, but I do truly want to respond to the Spirit’s prompting when the words start piling up and rearranging themselves in my mind. I do want to share the encouragement I find so regularly in the person of God. And I do want to honor what it is that you have worked hard to encourage in me.

Thank you for being here at My Place of Peace. It’s an honor to journey together with you! Happy New Year, friends!

Thankful for Yellow and Brown Swirl Carpet (and a special giveaway)

2011-11-21T15:57:00.000-08:00

I'm excited to be entering the blogging world again, starting with a Thanksgiving post at Missionary Moms! I'd love to have you pop on over to say hi and enter our giveaway!

God Shouts

2011-05-23T22:48:00.003-07:00

"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." C.S. Lewis

Though I don't ask for pain, it awakens my senses like nothing else can. I have known this before. Now I live it again.

I see the spoon God offers me. I put it to my lips reluctantly and wonder, "Can I really swallow this strong tonic? Or will it kill me?" I don't know if I can withstand this pain.

I am weak and too often buried under my circumstances. I have swam in the torrent of my own tears. I've been captive of fear, prisoner of panic, slave of self-pity.

"Lord, I believe! Help Thou my unbelief! Though you slay me, I will trust in You." Tentative, I open my mouth to take it all in. My unbelief lingers. I expect to sputter out a "Marah".

But instead I taste honey. And it is good. Not because it cures me. Not because I suddenly feel no pain. It is good because it is wakes me up to God near, nearer than ever before. He's everywhere. His goodness, His mercy, His grace, His love, His comfort.

Do you think God is shouting? Or am I just FINALLY listening?

Continuing the count:

997. MS
1026. Jesus! Hope!
1064. Driftwood cross
1099. All for His glory
1100. All for my good
1111. Budding trees
1116. Laughing until you cry - twice in one day!
1129. Heart groaning
1130. Redemption coming
1165. God's friend
1174. Gentle breezes
1206. Birdsong
1212. God shouting

God Is Good (Diagnosis:MS)

2011-05-09T21:18:00.000-07:00

Easter 2011

Hi! It's been so long since I've posted, you might not even know that I had been sick and we returned to the US at the end of March for some medical testing.

Last Friday my neurologist called to inform us that I have multiple sclerosis (MS). At this point, the disease does not appear to have done much damage, thankfully, and I feel well. We are still very much hoping to return to Paraguay, though we do need to remain in the US for now since I need to have some follow up testing in 6-9 months.

We would greatly appreciate your prayers as we process this information, work to educate ourselves about MS, and explore my options for treatment and prevention of future damage. There is currently no cure for MS, but it is very treatable and we have hope that I will be able to function well and manage the symptoms successfully for many years to come.

Now, if that was all that needed said, you would have seen this post three days ago when I started it. However, I knew you would be concerned about how we are doing emotionally having received this news. And that's the part that's a bit more difficult to put into words. I would say we are grieving hopefully. Grieving because we are human and we fear the potential implications of having a debilitating disease. And hopeful because we wholeheartedly trust our Creator and Sustainer to be near and give us victory in this situation! Remember how the apostle Paul described it? "We are troubled, yet not distressed; we are perplexed but not in despair...Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed day by day."

Our heart's desire is to actively proclaim God's goodness, even in this. Maybe especially in this. He is good, only does good and works out all things for our good. MS=good? Crazy! It's a debilitating disease! But if a debilitating disease causes us to know Him more fully, it is. If it causes us to live more purposefully, more passionately, it is. If it brings Him honor in some way that we still can't foresee, it is. May you also taste and see His goodness today, no matter what you are facing in your own life!

Love,

Shilo

P.S. If you have a few minutes, I encourage you to read John Piper's excellent article "Don't Waste Your Cancer". Obviously I don't have cancer, but I think the truths are transferable and it encouraged me!

My Beautiful Family

2010-12-04T16:39:00.001-08:00

Our Peaceful Place

2010-09-25T18:28:00.001-07:00

Welcome to our home! I am so glad you came! :) We are blessed to be renting this house from another missionary family who will not need it for the next five plus years. It’s incomprehensible, in the most wonderful way, to think about not having to move for that long!

When you walk through the front door (which is to the right of my purse), you enter the dining room. The table remains my favorite piece of furniture!

Still to do: The curtains are going to get a little lengthening treatment so I can get away from the high water look (and also hopefully raise the curtain rods a bit so that the ring clips are not competing with the window trim). Stay tuned!

The dining room and living room are actually one long, skinny room. This is the furniture I had to work with for this small living space but I was not happy with the lack of color, pattern, varied wood tones or scale (the sofa is much too bulky)! Alas, that is life when you buy furniture for one rental and have to find a way for it to work in the next. :)

So first, my super talented friend (and now sewing teacher) Brenda made the chair slipcovers and I used a painters drop cloth to cover the coffee table.

Even though it didn’t feel right, it stayed this way until the weather got cold and we moved the couch right in front of the fireplace for staying warm!

Then it dawned on me: putting the arrangement on the diagonal took away the improper balance of weight in the room! It felt so much better! Eventually, I hope to get 2 side chairs (with my Christmas money??) so that we aren’t sitting on hard dining room chairs for visiting with our friends! :) But for now, it works and all it cost was less than $15 for the chair slips.

Still to do: Sew some little pillows to put on the chairs for color and verve . It’s all a bit predictable right now! :) Also, hang some family pictures! It’s driving me crazy that we only have one picture of family hanging on the walls!

Across from living room on the left is the entrance to the TV room. We’ll skip the toy mess and move on. :)

Next you come to the main bathroom on the right. The brown shower curtain was one I had on hand. It was ok, but it just felt like it went a little too well with the 70’s tile, so I used some of my birthday money (thanks Dad and Mom) to buy this fabric. After a couple of sewing lessons, I completed my first big project! I’m happy with it.

Because the ceiling is low, I wanted the shower curtain to go to the ceiling to make the room look bigger, as well as hide the shower head, etc. Unfortunately, it needs to be a few inches off the floor because of the water drainage.

I’m hoping to find a pretty burnt orange rug to warm up the space a bit and eventually I think it would look much better to have burnt orange/rust/umber walls too. The current paint color works well in the rest of the house, but for some reason (lighting?) it doesn’t look that great in here.

I’d also like to replace the tan towels with burnt orange (if I don’t end up painting) because that would really help the paint color to look less “off” as well (I always have so many plans for my Christmas money!!). For now, it’s fine!

If you continue straight down the hall, you get to my kids’ room but I didn’t take photos of that either. Hardly anything is done in there. I still have beds to paint, hang their names, etc. The do have their Pottery Barn Inspired Transportation Art hanging though. :)

Then to the left at the end of the hallway is the master bedroom. You can see I did a little rearranging since this and this. I wasn’t happy with the headboard so this is what I came up with for now. Often in the past, I have used a window for the “headboard” but I could not get that to work for me this time because of where the windows are located! Oh well! Eventually, we’ll figure out a headboard, maybe even by filling in the other one with some bead board or something.

The desk was formerly my hall table but it was a lot prettier than my other desk and fit the space better too so it got a coat of white. I absolutely love it!

The location of the bed is totally impractical for opening the windows, but I’m more “form” than a “function” so for now it stays!

Still to do: Some sort of art or pictures!

I’m sure you are wondering about the kitchen…I’ve got a project brewing there (hint: it has to do with the Sermon on the Mount) and I want to finish it first! But I do have plenty of cabinet and counter space which is such a blessing!

So, now that we have the house tour out of the way, we can sit down for a good latte and visit a bit! You KNOW you are always welcome here!

Remind Me to Praise You

2010-09-21T18:29:00.001-07:00

Dear Father,

Thank you for all You are and all You have graciously given me. I long to have a thankful heart that is easily given to Your praise, to lifting up Your name.

Yet, so often, Lord, I confess that I fail to stop and know You. I merely rush through my day not acknowledging the blessings I am already experiencing.

I pray that Your Spirit would minister to my heart in those moments with a reminder, with a word of caution, that I might slow down, stop and bless Your name!

For You are the mighty God of the universe, the Creator of the ends of the earth, the One who has existed from eternity and who rules with power, justice and love. You are an awesome God. Nothing compares to You. Your deeds are unmatched and recounted all the world over! You rule and reign in majesty! You reveal the thoughts and intents of hearts and cleanse by the power of your own Son’s blood! You deserve to be praised!

You saved me, redeemed me, made me one of Your own! Thank you for Your unmerited favor and for Your mercy towards me, oh God! I don’t deserve what You have given me, what You have done for me, but I am so grateful to You, the Giver of all good gifts!

*Originally written in December 2009, before God healed me completely from the vision loss in my left eye. It was followed by 4 pages of things I was thankful for. I found it again today and thought it was fitting for a 1000 Gifts post.

797. The privilege of homeschooling!

803. A loving family to miss

813. Sewing Lessons

814. An imperfect, but finished shower curtain

818. Dessert blooms

825. A gentle breeze

836. The pain that drives us to Him

837. My 5 year old reading to me! Wonder!

A Million Miles

2010-09-16T12:09:00.001-07:00

When your mama turns 50, you can’t be there to embrace her. A million continent miles stand between you.

Your heart clenches tight, your eyes leak your pain, and you’re sure a million miles just might kill you.

You’ve counted the cost. And you do it again. A million miles offered up on the altar.

But as you watch them burn up (sweet aroma to Him, you pray), you think of another million miles. The chasm between God and man.

Though it’s long been bridged by God Man blood, (and by grace, through faith you’ve crossed it), still so few know that Eternal Balm came to mend the million mile tear in their hearts. You have to stay and tell them.

A million miles. How strange that the thing that rends your heart is the very thing that compels you to stay.

I’m Looking Out the Window

2010-09-13T18:19:00.001-07:00

Twenty years later, I find her words ringing in my ears. I miss that voice enough to squeeze my eyes shut hard, stop the tears springing up and listen. How I cherish this hands on hips proclamation returned to me. Would that she could too.

We were rolling down some Montana highway when she’d marched to the back of the motor home and stood over us. My cousin and I were each perched on skinny twin couches next to a window.

“You may not read one more page of those books until you look out the window for at least 30 minutes!”

Even though I knew Grandma was given to passionate proclamations from time to time, this one surprised me. After all, she was an avid reader. That same summer, I’d caught her up “way too late” because she couldn’t stop the turning of the page.

Still, there was another narrative she found more powerful than any type engraved in paper. The one that has no words, yet speaks with a powerful voice, declaring the glory of God. That was the one she was compelled to help us discover.

And she did. A thousand times before and after, so subtly that I’m not sure a one of us were cognizant of it at the time: slipping into a chair on the front deck at sunrise, coffee cup in hand; going barefoot through the ice cold stream; stopping on the trail to photograph a tiny pink flower; laughing at the fish jumping in the hatchery brook for five cent handfuls of food. Peaks out the window, all.

Grandma, today I want you to know I’m listening. I’m pulling my nose out of the book of daily living for a look out the window, for a listen to the glory song. I need to hear it. I need to remember that the very thing that lifts me to a place of holy wonder is also the thing that grounds me - the worship of my Creator.

Looking out the window, the incomplete count continues:

491. Snail mail

506. 95 Manjui Baptized, wish I could have seen it with my own eyes!

536. Family visiting from Colombia and the USA

570. Sanapana Scripture portions ready for printing

587. Pain that pushes us hard into Jesus

606. Cries of inadequacy

607. His sufficiency

669. Rain!

710. Explosions of yellow, tiny but beautiful

726. Grandma Bert

756. Dreams – wild, crazy, with God all things are possible dreams

776. Salmon Sky

781. Wild love, undeserved

788. My wonderful, merciful Savior

Pottery Barn Kids Inspired Transportation Art

2010-08-11T05:45:00.001-07:00

photo credit

When I saw these the other cute painted canvases the other day (for $39 each – yikes!), I decided to make my own version for free using fabric and frames that I had on hand.

Darling Little Redhead chose the truck. And we together chose the boat for El Principito. I was thankful that’s how it worked out because the airplane looked the most complicated!

These will go above each boy’s bed. I hope to make a small coordinating pillow too. I’m not sure if that comes before or after painting their bed frames but hopefully it will all be done before too much longer!

Have a wonderful day everyone!! May the joy of the Lord be your strength!

General Tsao’s Chicken (Better than the Restaurant)

2010-07-23T15:09:00.001-07:00

photo credit

Sauce:

Ingredients: ½ C cornstarch, ¼ C water, 1 T minced fresh garlic, 1 ½ tsp ginger (or fresh grated), ¾ C sugar, ½ C soy sauce, ¼ C white vinegar, 2 ¼ C chicken broth, 1 tsp salt

Instructions: Put all ingredients in a jar, shake and set aside (or refrigerate). Just shake again when you are ready to use it.

Chicken:

Ingredients: 2- 2 1/2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken breast, cut into chunks, ¼ C soy sauce, 1 egg beaten, 1 C cornstarch, oil for deep frying

Instructions: Mix chicken and soy sauce. Stir in egg. Add cornstarch and mix until chicken pieces are coated. It’s pretty gooey and nasty looking. Deep fry until golden brown then drain.

Combine Sauce and Chicken:

Ingredients: 1 C sliced green onions, hot peppers to taste

Instructions: Sauté 1 cup sliced green onions and hot peppers in a bit of oil. Add sauce mixture and cook until thick. Then add chicken until rewarmed. If desired, throw some broccoli crowns in with the chicken and it will cook to perfection while the chicken warms.

Serve with rice.

Please let me know if you try this recipe!! I would love to hear what you think!

Top 5 Cooking Epiphanies, 2010 Version

2010-07-22T12:51:00.001-07:00

5. In my kitchen, cookbooks just take up space (don’t shoot me)! I rarely use them and prefer tried and true recipes from friends or highly rated recipes at Allrecipes.com. Now that I realize that, I’ll stop carting them around the globe!

Here are a few of my favorites from All Recipes: JP’s Big Daddy Biscuits, Jay’s Signature Pizza Crust, Baked Teriyaki Chicken, Rhubarb Strawberry Jam (my kingdom for some rhubarb right about now!) and One Bowl Chocolate Cake.

Bottom Line: I stick with the tried and true and that is ok!

4. Grating an onion doesn’t make you cry like chopping one does. I am also less likely to injure myself with a grater than I am with a knife. :) Not to mention the fact that my kids and onion hating brother-in-law are less likely to notice onions in this form!

Bottom Line: Am I the last person on the planet to figure this out??

3. I can make it! Whether it is rolling out a flaky pie crust, frying up some down home chicken or making Crispy and Creamy Donuts, it’s possible. To me those foods seemed complicated and like they took special skill, but I finally just tried them! Sure I’m not famous for any of these things (yet, lol) but but no one is complaining!

Bottom Line: No more saying, “I don’t know how to make that!” Just give yourself plenty of time and try it!

photo credit

2. General Tsao’s Chicken made at home tastes JUST as good as the restaurant! My husband and every single person I have made it for wholeheartedly agree!

Bottom Line: You want the recipe, right?

1. Cooking is holy work! My new mantra is “I don’t feed bodies, I feed souls!” and I think I’m going to paint that on the wall of my kitchen for those times when I forget that the heart of my work in the kitchen is NURTURING and LOVING my precious family and friends!

Bottom Line: If you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some souls to feed!

What have you learned about cooking in 2010? I’d love to hear!

Hand Holding and Sitting By the Fire

2010-07-19T09:22:00.001-07:00

My honey was in the hospital for 3 1/2 days last week, so this weekend we did a lot hand holding, resting and basking the warmth of the crackling fire (it’s winter here!). My soul feasted and was fed by God’s gracious favor.

Praying your soul was also fed this weekend as you enjoyed His good and perfect gifts!

“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father…” James 1:17

Sometimes it Takes a Month

2010-07-07T09:17:00.001-07:00

Exactly one month after we moved into our house, we finally hung window treatments! Part of the slow down was that I didn’t find anything I loved in our little town so I was waiting to shop in the big city. I’ll tell you more about that trip soon…but for now, I couldn’t wait to show you! I think they were worth the wait! Special thanks to my Dad and Mom for the birthday money! :)

I am also thrilled with my screen door mirror! My former landlady generously gave me the screen door and when I was thinking about how nice it would be to have a full length mirror, this idea dawned on me.

Now, let’s just hope it doesn’t take me another month to finish this room! And that another month doesn’t pass before my next blog post! :) Can’t wait to tell you all I’ve been up to!

Sneak Peak

2010-06-21T11:46:00.001-07:00

Hi! I’m still working on decorating our new home, but I thought you would enjoy a few sneak peaks!

Beautiful Kitchen Cabinets

The last of my birthday flowers :)

I smile EVERY time I see this!

Bedroom…hoping to find fabric for curtains in the capital this week!

We made the headboard out of a screen door our last landlady gave me! I would like to put fabric in the openings. We’ll see! :)

This is what the little chalkboard usually looks like. Ha ha! We try to dwell peacefully, but more often we dwell with a little bit of chaos and craziness around here! :)

Hugs! Hoping to show you a more finished house soon!!!

One Year in Paraguay!

2010-06-16T17:23:00.001-07:00

Today we celebrate one year of ministry in Paraguay! I am so thankful to the Lord for how much this country and her precious people have worked their way into my heart already! I can honestly say I love it here!

Three moves, learning a new culture and ministry, one major health crisis and 4 extra kiddos made this a busy and challenging year to say the least, and yet I wouldn’t trade what CHRIST has done in me through it all. I pray that He will continue to increase in my heart and somehow use me to make Him known here in Paraguay.

Thank you so much for your love, prayers and support over the past year! I am so thankful for every single one of you who read my blog!

Also, I hope to get back to blogging regularly again soon. I have really missed it! Thanks for your patience while I finish getting settled in house number three and also host some family visiting from Colombia and the United States. I’ll be back soon with pictures of our new home!

I Love Being a Mother

2010-05-09T08:57:00.001-07:00

Darling Little Redhead and El Principito,

I’m so blessed to be your mother! Thank you for all the joy, laughter, hugs, kisses, creativity, fun and LOVE you bring to my every day! I love you!

Mom

Dear Mom, I Think I Know How You Feel

2010-05-04T19:57:00.001-07:00

Dear Mom,

I think I know how you feel.

They left again today. So excited to be heading towards their dream.

New home.

New ministry.

New life.

In my mind, I’m happy for them. Thrilled really. It’s so obvious that they were created for this.

In my heart though, I’m sad. So, so sad for all the things that I must release to wistful “Someday”.

Daily phone calls about, “What’s for dinner?” and “They had broccoli at the supermarket.” and “El Principito said ‘I love you’!”

Spontaneous coffee dates.

Hugs. The really tight kind.

Taking way too long to figure out who’s hosting Friday night dinner.

Now those things are lost in yesterday. From here on out, we’ll always be playing catch up. Trying to somehow find time to fill each other in on the important details of life.

And the small ones, the ones that I find so comforting and familiar, their telling will be lost in that elusive 25th hour of the day.

What’s more, I fear there’s coming a time when they’ll mention something that has become commonplace to them, and I will have absolutely no idea what they are talking about. Their life is so different from mine now.

Just as it should be. They’re following hard after Jesus and I’m inspired by Him in them.

Unfortunately, inspiration doesn’t prevent grief.   My humanity can’t escape the heart squeezing, tear falling, lonely moments.

Up until now, I’ve always been the one leaving family behind. My heart still ached, but then grief was tempered by firm conviction in God’s plan, excitement for dreams come true, amazement at God’s provision and care, perhaps even by mere relief to be finally settled in one place again.

But now, I’m the one staying. This time, I’m wearing your shoes, Mom. And it hurts. Oh, does it hurt to know what you’re losing.

You never told me what tremendous resolve it takes to smile and cheer when you really want to tie a brick around their ankles and beg them to stay forever.

I’m wondering if maybe it’s not the ones who “Go” who sacrifice most, but the ones who stay behind.

I think I know now, at least in part, how you must feel when I’m the one boarding the plane, carrying your grandbabies off to distant lands when they’ve only just began to know who you are.

I’m so glad I have your example, Mom. You’ve counted the cost for Jesus and it has made it easier for me to do the same.

Both in the leaving and in the loving of one leaving.

Counting all things lost,

Shilo

Tasting Goodness

2010-04-23T11:08:00.001-07:00

“Taste and see that the Lord is good. Oh, the joys of those who trust in Him!” Psalm 34:8

What’s Different: We Don’t Knock, We Clap

2010-04-21T16:23:00.001-07:00

When you arrive to someone’s house here in Paraguay, you don’t walk right up to the front door and knock. Instead you stand at the edge of their porch and clap. If they don’t come to the door, you can try to clap again louder and say hello to see if they just didn’t hear you the first time.

Several times there has been someone at my house and I didn’t realize it until I just happened to walk out into my kitchen and see them. I am not quite used to listening for the clapping, so I think that is the main reason I miss it, though we do almost always have a fan too on which drowns out a lot of noise!

How do you announce your arrival to someone’s home in the country where you live? I’d love to hear!

photo credit

True Beauty Does

2010-04-20T09:55:00.001-07:00

Double beep marks the arrival of his message and heart warms fast with love as I read.

“When I saw you in the rear view mirror…

I was reminded again of how beautiful you are.”

Smile broadens and head tips back with a laugh. I’m so blessed by his thoughtful love.

Fingers quick, tap out reply.

“Thanks, honey! Now if only beauty would calm a grouchy baby!”

It’s been a rough day, this. Nothing seems to soothe the little one.

I’ve barely pressed send when another message arrives. This time, it’s not words on screen but voice in heart.

“Oh, Shilo…but it does! True beauty does.”

I know this voice and I know it can only speak truth. My brain strains to understand what He means; to remember how He defines true beauty. Desperate to comprehend, I go to the Words of Life.

“That is the way the holy women made themselves beautiful. They trusted God.” I Peter 3:5 NLT

True beauty is trusting God. This is His message to me. It’s powerful in it’s simplicity.

Piercing conviction and wild hope converge in my heart and words spill out,

“Father, forgive me for not looking to You for wisdom about how to comfort and console my little one today! I depended on my own intuition and it failed me miserably.

I believe you spoke to me for a reason! You want to show me how being truly beautiful…how trusting You makes a difference in all the little situations in my day! I do trust you. I wait for your wisdom.”

Heart quiet, I hear His voice again.

“Sit down and play with the child, Shilo. Just play with him.”

Tears spill. I gather toys. We sit. Play. He calms. Smiles. Laughs for the first time all day.

I’m humbled, amazed, and thankful. And I’m believing with all my heart the message He spoke to me today. True beauty does, because true beauty is born out of the fierce belief that the all wise, loving God of the universe has the power to change every situation in my life!

Ribbon Weave Tutorial: Use Ribbon to Dress Up Your Table

2010-04-16T11:15:00.001-07:00

I am always on the lookout for decorating ideas for special occasions. My two requirements are: Does it use items which are commonly available to me living abroad? And is it affordable? I find many of the fabulous ideas out there don’t make the cut because they are either hard to implement without access to fully stocked craft store or are cost prohibitive.

That’s why I absolutely love this idea. You can find ribbon almost anywhere in the world and usually it is reasonably affordable.

photo: marthastewartweddings.com

I adorned our table for Easter Brunch in turquoise, navy blue and yellow (inspiration from here) this year. Unfortunately, there are no pictures because ~~it was a dark, rainy day and because~~ I was too busy keeping my 18 month old from undoing my ribbon weave. After the fourth time of reweaving ribbons, my husband said, “Well, dear, just remember, Martha Stewart never had a busy little boy helping her decorate.” Indeed!

The hardest part of this project is figuring out how much ribbon you will need in each color. After that, it’s a breeze!

1. Put your tablecloth on the table, then decide how far you want the ribbon to fall from the edge of the table.

2. Measure the length of your desired look. Multiply this number by the amount of times you plan to use the ribbon length wise.

For instance, in the picture above, the green ribbon is used twice down the middle of the table. Say the table is six feet long and you want a six inch drop on each side. That’s seven feet.

7 ft. x 2 times = 14 ft.

3. Measure the width of your desired look. Multiply this number by the amount of times you plan to use the ribbon width wise.

Going back to Martha’s picture, the green ribbon is draped four times across the width of the table. Let’s imagine the table is three feet across and you want a six inch drop on each side. That’s four feet.

4 ft. x 4 times = 16 ft.

4. Add the total length and the total width of the ribbon.

14 ft length + 16 ft width = 30 feet of green ribbon

5. Determine how many times you will use each of the additional colors. Complete steps two through four to determine the total yardage you will need for each color. This will go quickly since you already know your width and length!

6. Buy, weave, make your guests feel valued and loved.

If you are able, buying ribbon in differing widths adds more interest to the look. If you can’t, who cares! It still looks great!

For the actual weaving process, I laid all the lengths first, then weaved in all the widths.

Too complicated or expensive? Then how about this idea from my pre-blogging days?

All you need is one thick ribbon laid flat, one contrasting length of tulle twisted and one coordinating skinny ribbon twirled over it all.

Ribbon is a great, affordable way to adorn your table! An added benefit is that, unless you have a food fight, the majority of the ribbon will be reusable for other things after your meal!

No matter where you live, no matter your budget, there is ALWAYS a way to make your family and friends feel loved by creating a beautiful table setting!

Close Enough to Breathe

2010-04-13T19:36:00.001-07:00

I’ve admired it for a few days, small little patch of climbing pink flowers on the old tree trunk turned pillar near my driveway.

A word of praise to God for this beautiful gift births a longing I can’t quench. I have to get closer. Seeing from afar isn’t enough, I need to breathe it’s scent, to trace it’s winding path with my fingers.

I breathe and trace and notice my gift has welcomed another praise giver. Majestic Butterfly. He rests light and breathes sweet scent.

Praise invites us to take a closer look. A closer look confirms that which our hearts instinctively know. There is more. More than a flower, there is a butterfly. More than a far off view of splendor, there is a God and a glory that is close enough to breathe.

Savoring the sweet scent of His never ending goodness:

286. Conversations over the dishes

295. God’s Word in my language

304. Practical parenting wisdom spoken by God’s Spirit straight to my heart

327. Dog and boy playing tug-o-war

334. A dream come true

355. Grandma’s blue glass and precious memories

380. Our welcome to this community

409. Cool days

429. Little boy jokes

431. Christ’s death in my place

452. That His Word always has more for me

466. Porch sitting with my love

474. Kids who love to read

Pillars of Love

2010-03-17T00:52:00.001-07:00

Walking, wandering they catch my eye.

Aged by time, colored beautiful by the elements.

They aren’t just borders, boundaries, no.

Rather pillars of some pilgrims love for his land.

They whisper that which my soul has already begun to know,

this is a land worth loving.

It is, and I do.

These are my pillars now too.

Two Little Redheaded Gift Finders

2010-03-15T18:47:00.001-07:00

Today I am so thankful for my two little redheads. Not only are they themselves gifts from God, but they have taught me to slow down and be captivated by the mysterious and wonderful gifts God has laid in my path - gifts which I stopped pausing to unwrap along the road to busy adulthood and “important” work.

Thank you, Father, for entrusting me with these treasure seekers, these gift finders so I can learn to behold again the wonder of your world! You are the source of EVERY good and perfect gift!

Continuing the count, though it is surely incomplete…

233. Hysterical laughter at the dinner table

235. After school hugs

244. Sun rising

252. Restorative sleep

259. Sweet notes in the morning

265. Hazelnut coffee with my love

273. The luxury of learning

279. My dryer

281. Turquoise and the way it makes me smile

Looking Unto Jesus – Not Our Closest Friend

2010-03-14T09:42:00.001-07:00

If Jesus is kept between us and our closest friend,

our attachment to the person will be at the same time

less enthralling and more deep;

less passionate and more tender;

less necessary and more useful;

an instrument of rich blessing in the hands of God.

Looking Unto Jesus by Theodore Monod

Photo: mrinkk

What’s a Wedding Without a Little Music?

2010-03-12T10:44:00.001-08:00

Admittedly, things can get a little serious around here at My Place of Peace since this is where I process what is going on inside my heart. So I thought it was time for something fun!

This is an assignment which I completed in the second grade. I found it when we were packing to move to Paraguay. It makes me smile every time I read it!

“Yesterday we went to my Grandma Bert’s wedding. It was small. Shayna (my sister) screamed halfway through it. Then she ran to the nursery. Last of all we ate.”

In response, my teacher said, “Well, what’s a wedding without a little music? I bet that’s why your mom brought Shayna.”

Did your parents save any of your early writings? Are you saving any of your kids’ school assignments?

What’s Different – The Seven

2010-03-11T02:33:00.001-08:00

I learned a small but important difference recently when I ordered copies for my Bible study. This is what I ordered:

What do you read there? I thought I was writing page twenty seven to forty three, seven copies. Instead, I found out I wrote page twenty one through forty three, one copy. Hmmm…

Turns out, the seven here has a dash through it. Good to know! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to get my other six copies! :)

Finding Him in All Things

2010-03-08T15:15:00.001-08:00

"When in all gifts we find Him, then in Him we shall find all things." George MacDonald

This week I had the joy of finding Him in:

187. Naptime

190. Evening walks

201. Creamy mashed potatoes

205. A helpful husband

207. Hug in a box (package from home)

211. Slow days

212. Gentle breeze

215. Apples of gold

216. Tender souls

221. The baby’s laughter

230. Dew on grass and feet

232. My 10 year old espresso machine (may she never die!)

Looking Unto Jesus – Not What We Are Doing

2010-03-07T10:50:00.001-08:00

Looking unto Jesus and not at what we are doing for Him.

Too much occupied with our work, we can forget our Master.

It is possible to have the hands full and the heart empty.

Looking Unto Jesus by Theodore Monod

Photo: Auroqueiro

Fire Falling

2010-03-03T17:31:00.001-08:00

The sky’s ablaze with fire, and even from this side of the trees I’m breathless, captivated by the orb of falling rainbow light.

The fiery descent is stunning, but I still wish I was viewing it unobstructed. Then I wonder why I must always long for more when this present view delights and inspires just as it is.

I’ve experienced this before, the seeming juxtaposition of delighted wonder and fierce longing for more. Indeed, I’ve felt it most when looking on another Fire, an all consuming One. A glimpse of Him (though through darkened glass with earthly eyes) and I’m captivated, changed; yet I still yearn to bask in the fullness of His glory, to see Him unobstructed. I realize it’s no betrayal to long for more when there really is more.

And while here a tree may block glory from full view, I’m remembering that it was a Man on a tree that made Fire’s glory light eternally accessible to me.

“For now we see through a glass darkly; then face to face…” I Cor. 13:12

Still Counting All the Ways He Loves Me!

2010-03-01T09:25:00.001-08:00

Continuing to acknowledge all the ways He whispers, “I love you!”

132. Another step closer to a dream realized.

139. Little handprints on freshly cleaned glass – I enjoy them because I know someday I will long for them.

140. Double.Chocolate.Treats!

145. Exciting opportunity to grow with Philippians and 7 women.

150. Yummy candle and generous husband.

155. The explosion of flowers!

159. People who step out in faith, regardless of the cost!

173. He makes all things beautiful.

184. Freshly washed sheets

185. New Books!

Looking Unto Jesus – Not Our Faith

2010-02-28T06:17:00.001-08:00

The last device of the adversary,

when he cannot make us look elsewhere,

is to turn our eyes from our Savior to our faith,

and thus to discourage us if it is weak,

to fill us with pride if it is strong:

and either way to weaken us.

Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monod by Helen Willis

Photo: freefotouk

Mother of Six?

2010-02-25T06:02:00.001-08:00

As of March 1st, I will officially be mother of six! No, I’m not pregnant with quadruplets, but we do have the joy of dorming my three nephews and niece as their parents move into a new ministry in a remote tribal location.

We are inspired by this family and their collective desire to sacrifice for the sake of the Gospel, part of which requires them to be separated for much of the school year.

We are also glad that we are here to do all we can to help them through this difficult adjustment. We would really appreciate your prayers for them and for us as we head into this new reality! They need God’s grace and strength as they say the very difficult goodbyes and adjust to their new homes! We need wisdom to be sensitive to the needs of our new “kids” as they go through this transition.

I have great hopes that this will be a special season for my nephews and niece, full of good memories of their time with us. More than that though, I pray that many people will come to know the grace found in Christ our Savior because we all have willingly given our lives, preferences and comfort for His glory!

You Fit

2010-02-23T11:11:00.001-08:00

The voice comes out of nowhere, stealth belying it’s powerful cruelty. “You don’t fit here!”

At first, I’m confused, then incredulous that I should feel this way now, here in the midst of my own people. But I still listen and believe and four little words derail an entire week.

As a missionary woman, I’m prepared to feel different when I arrive to a new country and culture. It’s just stating the obvious to say I don’t completely fit here (yet). As much as I work to become all things and strive to adapt to my new home, I know it just takes time. So, I wouldn’t be injured if that’s what the voice was referring to.

But it’s not. No, it’s condemning me now, while I’m spending a week at our mission base, surrounded by my own countrymen. I’m caught completely off guard by the echoes of “You don’t belong”. I never expected to hear them here.

(Lest one of my dear coworkers read this and wonder if something was done to make me feel this way, let me just state very clearly that no one did anything unkind or said anything thoughtless or was anything but gracious to me.)

I let four words reverberate in my mind, pierce my soul. With surprising speed they multiply, accusing me with increasing disdain.

“You’re spoiled! You have a dryer. Everyone else uses a clothesline.”

“You’re frivolous! You love to shop and wear high heels and dangly earrings.”

“You’re selfish! You don’t enjoy your children as much as she does.”

“You’re soft! You can’t endure a few hours of heat for the chance to visit with friends.”

“You’re shallow! You spend too much time thinking about how to make your house beautiful.”

My soul is painfully crippled and I am exhausted from repeatedly telling myself that these things are not true, when all the while I fear that they really are.

My soul needs true revival, not a pep talk, so I go to the words of life. This time the voice I hear is His.

“Oh child, you BELONG. I chose you. It brought me great pleasure to bring you to myself through Christ. You are my masterpiece! You fit in me.

I carefully chose you, with your unique interests and gifts, to be a part of my body. I put you where I want you, high heels and all. It pleases me to see you doing the special work you were created to do. You fit in my body, child.

And you are neither spoiled, frivolous, selfish, soft or shallow. I never think that when I think of you. My voice rises above all others to declare you Holy, Blameless, Complete, Accepted and Loved. Will you listen to me? Will you believe me, child?”

“Yes, Lord!,” I cry. “I believe! Help my unbelief!” The condemning voices fade and I’m free.

**As painful as it is to admit that I wasted so much joy last week, I know that there is nothing new under the sun. I hope that sharing my experience will encourage someone else who is wading their way through a murky mess of lies. There is never joy in comparing ourselves amongst ourselves, because we are such ignorant judges. The only One that can declare the truth about us sit on high and has already made it abundantly clear. We fit.**

Scripture: Ephesians 1:3-8, 2:10, 2:21-22; I Corinthians 12:18-20

Hidden Gifts Found through Praise

2010-02-22T12:43:00.001-08:00

The more I praise God for all His gifts, the more my heart ascends to a place of exhilaration. I am changed, and He is glorified, when acknowledge how frequently, consistently, and deeply His fingerprints dot the landscape of my life.

Sometimes, like this past week, His handprint at first seems misplaced in the uncomely, the undesirable and I am blind to see how these things can be gifts. So I am thankful to be on this journey of a 1000 gifts because

the looking leads to finding,

the finding leads to praising,

the praising leads to glorifying,

and the glorifying leads to exhilarating

in Him, my greatest gift.

Continuing to count the ways He blesses me:

83. A home that feels like us.

87. Raspberries.

90. My failures and how they reveal areas in my life that need transformed.

94. God’s word – my soul’s reviver.

102. Christ is coming soon!

104. Being literate and the luxury of having affordable literature available in my language.

108. Measuring, dumping and baking with my sous chef, Darling Little Redhead, and all the I love yous that ensued.

112. Sweeping and time to think.

114. Quiet talks in the night.

117. Protection of my children – we found a black widow this week in one of their toys!

128. I have been brought near to God through Jesus.

130. Rain and the way life bursts forth in flowers.

Looking Unto Jesus – and Not at Our Doubts

2010-02-21T07:50:00.001-08:00

Looking unto Jesus and not at our doubts. The more we look at them the larger they appear, until they can swallow up all our faith, our strength and our joy.

But if we look away from them to our Lord Jesus, who is Truth, the doubts will scatter in the light of His presence like clouds before the sun.

Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monod by Helen Willis

Photo: shannonc5

Fall Like Rain

2010-02-16T10:22:00.001-08:00

Oh God, as your truth falls on my heart, let it be to me a sweet rain. Welcomed. Savored. Soaked up.

For you are my Living Water, and your truth births fruit in the dry and desolate places of my soul.

Duet. 32:2, Hebrews 6:7, John 4:14

Partying in the Capital and the Praise Goes On

2010-02-15T17:02:00.001-08:00

We are in Asuncion this week for meetings, shopping…and a very special SURPRISE birthday party for three of our co-workers, turning 40, 50 and 6o respectively!

I had the joy of decorating for the party! The colors were black and white with red accents.

I love how these giant peonies hanging from the ceiling turned out…there were red ones too. I know you can get them pre-made in the US, but it really wasn’t too hard to make from scratch, just took a little time (but well worth it - I will definitely make them again).

The gift table centerpiece, just empty boxes wrapped up pretty! The fabric in the frame flanking it is leftover fabric from a skirt!

Just had to prove there really were some red accents! :)

These were to go in the food, but that didn’t quite work out so I just put them on the wall. Flexibility is key when you are making your decorations five hours away away from your party destination! :)

So you can see I have lots to be thankful about this week! Time to keep giving praise to the Blessed Controller of my life. I am so thankful for:

54. Chocolate Dipped Croissants in the capital

55. Absolutely no scarring to my optic nerve and a great report from my eye Dr.

56. New co-workers and their courage

57. Pain and the way it reminds me to think of others

61. El Principito saying thank you in his little baby voice

64. Ironing and the pleasure I get from removing wrinkles

67. Raspberry jam found!

69. That God is faithfully showing me areas where I am NOT thankful so I can change

71. Excuses to decorate

73. Polka Dots and the way they bring a smile to my face

74. People who keep loving even when it hurts and the inspiration they are to me

Grass Blowing in the Breeze

2010-02-08T09:20:00.001-08:00

Grass rustles in the wind and the praise goes on.

Thanking the Giver of all good gifts for:

11. Grass waving in the breeze at sunset, catching the last snatches of light

19. The way his laughter diffuses any tension

24. Mud puddles and the joy they bring to little boys

27. Convictions reaffirmed

30. Little voices reciting Psalm 23

36. Darling Little Redhead’s reminders that we must cuddle first thing every morning (but how could I ever forget?)

44. Peaches and cream in Grandma’s blue glass and reminders of her love

48. Butterflies that fly with damaged wings (Oh, how I see God’s redemption of my life in them!)

Looking Unto Jesus – Not Our Weakness

2010-02-07T07:17:00.001-08:00

By lamenting our weakness,

have we ever become more strong?

Let us look to Jesus,

and His strength will communicate itself to our hearts,

His praise will break forth from our lips.

Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monrod by Helen Willis

Photo: glendali

The Plagues of 2010

2010-02-03T09:35:00.001-08:00

Every time it rains here in the Chaco, we get a new wave of bugs. So far the worst was the plague of beetles that decided to make our porch (and air conditioner) their graveyard, leaving the stench of death everywhere!

Yesterday these funky grasshoppers meandered onto our porch. They are certainly the most interesting bug to visit us after a rain. They move really slowly and stay together in groups. I took this picture after I saw them from my kitchen window all circled around like they were having a big powwow.

Thought you’d like a little peak into my buggy world! After all, doesn’t every missionary have a bug story?

The Mundane Reborn as Worship

2010-02-01T11:05:00.001-08:00

It’s not just another pile of laundry…

or another stack of dishes.

It’s so much more for women who follow Jesus. Every laundry basket and kitchen sink becomes a heavenly altar, just waiting to receive our acts of worship, our acceptable sacrifice to the God of the universe.

I long to know that what I do all day actually matters. Yet no matter how many inspirational quotes I read about the importance of being a stay at home mom, no matter how many times my husband tells me he appreciates me, I occasionally still find myself resentful and grumbling about having to put the baby’s board books back on the shelf AGAIN.

It’s become pretty obvious to me that the only way I can maintain any long term passion for this job is to see each moment of my day as an opportunity for worship. Dirty nose needing wiped? “God, this is for you!” Peanut butter sandwich needing to be cut into triangles (squares won’t do!)? “Yes, Lord, thank you that I can serve you!” Superman’s cape needing reattached, “Oh God, my hands work for you!”

It’s nothing revolutionary, perhaps, but for me the simple act of speaking the truth changes my attitude about the mundane. Somehow laundry and dishes become almost desirable when they are reborn as opportunities to offer praise to God, my Strength!

And yes, I do need to say it over and over all day long because when I don’t, I forget. I forget that this is holy work and suddenly all I see are the dirty diapers waiting to be taken out to the trash, the leftovers needing to be put away and the toys strung from one end of the house to the other. I forget so quickly that these routine things have the capacity to be transformed into something with eternal value – the worship of the only true God.

I’ve decided to join Ann’s Gratitude Revolution so here’s the start of my list of a thousand gifts:

1) Truth – that it renews my mind and that it’s available in my language

2) Unexpected Hugs

3) Honey, Darling Little Redhead and El Principito…all producers of laundry and dishes…and opportunities to praise God! :)

4) Pancakes made with my sous chef, Darling Little Redhead

5) Wood puzzles with the baby and barking giraffes

6) A husband who cooks and cleans when I am unable (both with my eye crisis and again this weekend when I cut my hand and had to get five stitches)

7) Family on the mission field and our weekly dinner and game night

8) Nephews and Niece who love playing with my boys

9) For friends who accept me as I am

10) For Skype and email to communicate with family back home

Two Messages on Her Phone

2010-01-23T16:31:00.001-08:00

Standing next to me, arms around my waist, she holds tight. I start to move away but her voice stops me and we remain in the comfortable embrace of sisters. “I keep two messages on my phone,” she tells me.

I know what she’s going to say. The first is an encouraging message from a friend and the second is…her voice breaks into my knowing, “One says you are completely blind in your left eye.”

I’m genuinely surprised by her confession. Tears burn my eyes and I squeeze my lids tight to keep them from falling. I remember that message.

The voice which started out strong now falters a bit, but she gathers strength and continues, “The other says that your doctor thinks it’s a miracle that you have your sight back.”

With that, the floodgates are opened and my cheeks become spillways for tears. Voice thick with emotion, I manage to say, “I didn’t know.”

Now her tears join mine. “It’s just such a miracle,” she whispers.

“I know,” I say. “It is. It really is,” and for one holy, immeasurable moment we both marvel at the miracle.

I can’t help but think how wise she is to keep that visible reminder of our miracle (it’s hers and yours too because you prayed). Remembering the amazing things He has done for us not only brings us joy as we rejoice in the favor of our God, it also bolsters our faith that He will continue to work on our behalf and do exceedingly, abundantly above all we can ask or think!

Are you needing a miracle today? I encourage you to take a moment to strengthen your faith in His ability to do amazing things for you by remembering what He has ALREADY done!

photo: tpacific

Does it Matter if Our Kids See Us?

2010-01-20T10:12:00.001-08:00

A few days ago, I read an eBook called Maximize Your Mornings. The author encourages early rising in order to assure that time in the Word, prayer and exercise actually happen each day. The idea is to be able to do these things BEFORE anything or anyone else is needing your attention.

While this is certainly logical and efficient, and even the way I generally study personally, I have began to wonder where it is that my kids learn HOW to study the Bible if they never SEE me studying the Bible.

I have to ask myself, am I willing to MODEL this personal communion with the Lord to my children? It will no doubt mean more work and less effectiveness initially as I train them about not interrupting and respecting this time with the Lord. Still wouldn’t it be awesome to transmit by example a thirst for the Word, the need for communion with the God of the universe?

What do you think? Is it important that our kids actually SEE us studying the Word or do you think it is enough that we do it privately and they witness the fruit in our lives?

Beautiful Art No Matter Where You Live

2010-01-18T09:00:00.001-08:00

Need something to fill that blank space in your living room? Pop over to Missionary Moms for some doable and affordable ideas!

graphic by Ana, used by permission

The Power is Broken

2010-01-16T08:46:00.001-08:00

We were home alone that afternoon, my sisters and I. I walked into the kitchen, for I know not what, and found them dueling with the kitchen knives.

The little would-be gangsters froze as they turned and saw me. Knowing exactly what I was about to say, they stopped me before I could get the words out. “Please don’t tell Mom and Dad, please,” they begged. “You can’t tell them. You can’t!”

For some reason, I caved to their pleas and agreed not to disclose their foolishness, as long as they promised never to wield knives again. I don’t pretend to remember my motivation for this kindness. I certainly wasn’t cunning enough to think that if I didn’t tell, I would have leverage for blackmail. Oh, no. That realization dawned the first time they threatened to tattle on me for something I had done.

“You go right ahead,” I’d smirk. “But if you do, I’ll tell mom that you were playing with the sharp knives!” Inevitably as fear registered, shoulders would drop, mouths would close and my own transgressions (which were surely many) would be forgotten.

This blackmail continued for what must have been a months, a year even. I remember feeling surprised every time my words still evoked fear, every time my power over them was unchallenged.

Finally, one day my sister ended it. When I threatened to tell mom about the knives, she look at me with resolve and said, “Go ahead, I don’t care.” She had finally realized that she didn’t have to submit to my blackmail and just like that, my power over her was gone.

I wonder, how many times I am like my little sister, living under the thumb of that which has no power over me? How many times do I, as a Christ follower, surrender to the threats and manipulation of my old man, even though they should be nothing more than echoes in the far reaches of my memory? How can they be anything else when he who spoke them is long dead? Oh yes, he was crucified with Christ and thus rendered completely powerless over me. I am no longer his slave, forced to do all he demands.

“Our old sinful selves (old man) were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose it’s power in our lives. We are no longer slaves to sin.” Romans 6:6 NLT

How perplexing it is that I still voluntarily choose serve him, this old man of mine. Every time I sin, I it is as if I am choosing to lift his putrid corpse up onto my back so I can marinade in his stench, so I can be poisoned again by his vile suggestions, so I can obey him. Obey the dead.

Doesn’t it seem ridiculous to keep bowing in obedience to a stinking, rotting corpse? To make a mockery of Christ’s sacrifice by putting our feet back into the stocks of sin rather than dancing in the freedom He purchased for us with His own blood?

Indeed, it does. It makes the voice unkindly raised at my son heartbreaking, instead of excusable. It makes the pride in my heart revolting, instead of justifiable. It causes me to evaluate every snide remark, disrespectful thought, gluttonous moment in a new light. These are the things My Savior at once paid for and freed me from. But it’s not paid for so I can go on in this vicious, defeated existence. It’s paid for so I can, being free from sin’s power, choose to live for the glory of God through Him and with His strength. Oh, that I would faithfully, repeatedly, daily give myself completely to God and not to that which has no power over me.

“So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. For the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you through Christ Jesus from the power of sin that leads to death.” Romans 8:1-2, NLT

photo: chowell958

What’s Different – Trees in the Middle of the Road

2010-01-13T06:16:00.001-08:00

This is another one of my favorite things about Paraguay. Mature trees are not cut down when a new residential road is excavated! A reflector is simply placed on both sides of the tree and the road goes around it. I fid it very winsome and it makes a great landmark too!

Looking Unto Jesus – Not at Our Resolutions

2010-01-10T08:54:00.001-08:00

Looking unto Jesus and not at the sincerity of our intentions,

and at the strength of our resolutions.

Alas! How often the most excellent intentions have only

prepared the way for the most humiliating falls.

Let us stay ourselves, not on our intentions, but on His love;

not on our resolutions, but on His promise.

Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monod by Helen Willis

Photo: lusi

Mounting Wish’s Horse – Winter in January

2010-01-07T16:39:00.001-08:00

Sweat at my hairline and whir of fan cooling me, I sense my roots digging deeper into the soil of this blessed Paraguay. She’s home now.

Still, something about spending more than two decades passing these January days in snow covered landscape fills my heart with a strange longing for winter.

Suddenly, as if the beggar, I mount wish’s horse and am transported to the place where snow angels rest and leftover candy canes swirl in steamy hot cocoa. It’s winter in January.

I see myself there at the back door, carelessly slipping into dad’s packs. Mine fit too well and I don’t want to waste the time to pull them on.

I slip out the door and run quickly to the wood pile, shivering as I go, snow’s squeaky crunch trailing behind me. I grab two large logs, followed by few smaller ones. Arms full of food for flames hungry belly, I hurry back to the house.

Stamping feet at the door, I loosen snow’s pack. Sliding off dad’s boots, I slow my pace and head to the living room. Basking in the warmth of this home of mine, I dump more of the same into the wood box.

I stop a moment, warm my hands and see the old black cast iron kettle on top of the stove. She needs a drink so I quench her thirst. Then turning my back on her, I sit on the edge of the hearth till my back is hot and my bones unfrozen.

At first, I’m surprised that my longing for winter has brought me to this scene. Bringing in the wood was a chore, not a sacred winter memory. Why hadn’t I been taken to Fire Bell Hill where all the town’s children wasted away hours sledding, or Christmas Eve the year mom wrapped a huge box of bricks to disguise dad’s new hammer?

Still, as I look back, I wonder if maybe bringing in the wood was something sacred, both powerfully comforting in it’s repetition, and holy in it’s simple service to family.

To family casually gathered in the living room, basking in the warmth of that old wood burning stove. To dad in that crazy turquoise green rocker, the one draped with a knitted afghan. To one sister curled up under a blanket, and another lost in her book. To mom smiling as she challenged dad to another round of Tetris. To hearts melded together by the warmth of memories and wood.

All at once, I realize, it’s not one trip to the woodpile that I’ve just revisited. It’s a thousand jumbled together. Their collective happiness rises and my heart is full. I’ve had my taste of winter and I’m riding wish’s horse back to reality, back to summer in Paraguay.

Immanuel, God With Us

2009-12-25T01:47:00.001-08:00

Learning God’s character, as displayed through His names, was something that revolutionized the way I live my life. Every need I have finds it’s ultimate fulfillment in Him. I cling to Him as my Home when I am lonely and longing for stability. I look to Him as Counselor when I am needing wisdom as a parent. And I recently cried out to Him as Jehovah Rapha when I went blind in my left eye (in His great grace He has restored my vision almost back to normal).

This Christmas, more than any other, the name IMMANUEL (God with us) has been so precious to me. It’s no surprise, really, when I have just been touched by Him in such a powerful way. I speak not merely of His work as Healer, but also as the One who accompanied me through each test, IV treatment, each moment of waiting. The One who carried me through each disorienting hour, each sleepless night. He was WITH me in a way I have never experienced before, and now I have the joy of knowing Him more deeply. The very One who came as a babe, to die for me, is WITH me. My Savior. My Immanuel.

May He be WITH you today in a special way as well! Merry Christmas!

photo: Google images

Side Effects and Lies

2009-12-17T06:30:00.001-08:00

It was Monday night. Willing myself to sleep, I was quietly praying until that moment of surrender would come. It’s been so elusive and hard gained lately, just one of the side effects of my medication.

My prayers stilled though as He began to speak. “Child, you’ve been believing me strong and powerful enough to completely heal your eye. Why won’t you trust me to help you cope with the side effects of your medication? Have you forgotten how much I care about ALL the details of your life? Did you not think my Spirit’s power sufficient to give you strength to cope in a godly manner?”

Humbled and a bit stunned I say, “No, God. No. You’re right. I haven’t been believing you for that.”

The realization is sickening. I’ve been trying to deal with it all on my own. The heart pounding anxiety that creeps up, the lack of patience I feel when I’m surrounded by chaos and most of all the harsh tone my words take on as they fly from my mouth in an effort to make it all stop.

It dawns on me that deep down a lie is lurking. I’ve been believing that God is not enough, that He doesn’t really care about something as pesky as side effects. The fact that I didn’t even think to ask Him to empower my mind and my will to overcome the negative effects of my medication shows me one thing. At the core of my belief system, I am lacking faith in His character as the God who is passionately interested in renewing every detail of my life.

Though tempted to feel shame, I at once feel delight and freedom. For a betraying lie once captured and identified can be imprisoned and put to death. And as the traitorous soldier is carried away, I find there is room for truth to enter in and dwell.

I’m so thankful that His Spirit is faithful to reveal to us the darkness in our own hearts, the lies lurking there that we have yet to confront. And I praise Him that He really is enough, that His power is unending, that His character is sure, that His works are perfect and His words are right.

Whatever you are facing today, I pray that you will look to the truth of God’s character and be changed at the core of your being as you cry out together with me, “Lord, I believe! Help Thou mine unbelief!

“Lord, you have brought light into my life: my God you light up my darkness.”

photo: egahen

Christmas at My House

2009-12-14T14:59:00.001-08:00

Merry Christmas and welcome to my home! I’m so glad you’re here!

With my recent vision scare, I really focused on keeping things simple this year and it took me several days to get everything out. I was surprised at how very enjoyable it was to just do it little by little. And great news, I CAN SEE IT ALL. My left eye is still dimmer than the right but I am seeing amazingly well! Thank you so much for praying for me!

My nativity from Venezuela (our former country of service) greets you as you enter the room. Traditionally, Venezuelans do not place the baby Jesus in the manger until Christmas day, which I love the idea of, but can never quite bring myself to do.

Every year I cover the matte of our family picture with some wrapping paper. It takes about a minute and gives it a festive touch. Here’s what it looked like last year.

A few ornaments in the kitchen make me smile while I do the dishes!

My tree is gold, red and cream. This is Paraguayan Nyanduti that I thought would be beautiful as snowflakes. They would use these to embellish a top or a dress.

I just love my little 10 cent birdies. I think my husband finds them mildly creepy though! :)

My favorite ornaments (also used on the kitchen curtains) were an after Christmas clearance steal at Target last year while we were on home assignment.

With cement walls, we don’t drill holes for stockings, so my ring clips came to the rescue! I love how “limitations” make you more creative and you come up with something unique that you really love.

Thanks for stopping by! I only wish it was in person so I could make you a latte and share some yummy Christmas cookies over a good visit!

A Father’s Presence Changes the Storm

2009-12-10T02:59:00.001-08:00

I’ve never been afraid of storms. In fact, I rather love them. Some of my favorite memories with my father include sitting out on the porch together during a good storm: watching, listening, being awed by a powerful lightening strike and feeling thunder reverberate through my body. I love storms because my father loves storms.

Last night, I had the joy of storm watching with my Darling Little Redhead. We laid on our tummies and watched from the bedroom window. He talked and giggled and gasped occasionally. And I smiled repeatedly, because he wasn’t afraid. On the contrary, he was actually delighting in the storm and in being together through it.

The thunder is still rolling now twelve hours later. All through the night she woke me with her groans. Sometimes near, sometimes far, but consistently reaching my heart with her message. “I am not to be feared! I only exist to give you a chance to sit next to Your Creator God, where He can guard your heart with peace, in the midst of me.”

Are you going through a storm of your own today? Is fear gripping you? Keeping you inside your cozy home, cringing at the sound of thunder, frozen so you don’t move? My friend, step out onto the porch with our loving Father! Behold the power of the One who made the storm. There is such joy in riding it out at His side, holding His hand, looking into His heart and knowing NOTHING can touch you that He doesn’t allow .

“Who is this man, that even the wind and the waves obey him?” Luke 8:24

photo: nespresso

P.S. With everything going on, I forgot to announce that my friend Alisha in Argentina won the My Two Favorite Things Giveaway! Congrats, Alisha!

Bruises Fading, Fears Rising

2009-12-04T08:25:00.001-08:00

There are only four of them left. Streaks of purple and brown, standing as gates marking painful entrance to the river of life, to my life blood. Gates pried open to give carriage remedy for my blind eye.

Fading to green and yellow now, they’re very unbecoming. Still, I look at them and cringe a bit as they fade, crumbling away, being toppled by time. Resentful, perhaps that they are stealing my reminder that I was sick. That I was blind. That I was broken. That I called out to God in desperation, in full trust. That He was there completely, powerfully encompassing me.

It’s not that I want to stay blind, to stay sick. I want to see. I plead with God for His mercy and the complete return of my eye sight.

But as they fade, these bruises of mine, I find in their wake a wicked host of fears rising. I should be honest. It’s really only one fear. The fear of forgetting. But this woman, this fear, she quickly gives birth to a thousand children and before I know it they are surrounding me, laughing at me, mocking me. Their names are mediocrity, normalcy, routine living, lack of the passionate pursuit of Jesus, failure to acknowledge His power and presence in my life again.

And I don’t want to forget. I can’t afford to forget. I want this to be my Ebenezer, an indelible landmark upon the map of my life that God has been my Helper.

Oh, I know fear will not guide me to the place that I long for. For my fear is born of self dependence, of self effort, of self importance. Self would never allow me to circumnavigate these treacherous, rocky straits. It would not, because it could not for self can only return to self.

There’s only one way I’ll only survive this storm of reproach and condemnation. If I look up to my True Compass, God my Helper. Only then can my ship be guided safely to the peaceful harbor of His grace. Only then can I arrive whole at the beautiful banks of my homeland and run into His open arms. Only then can I remain in the land of remembering.

“For the word of God is full of living power. It is sharper than the sharpest knife, cutting deep into our innermost thoughts and desires. It exposes us for what we really are.” Hebrews 4:12, NLT

A Word of Praise to Our Great God!

2009-12-03T23:56:00.001-08:00

Finally! I am so blessed to be sitting here in my own home, thinking about you, having the chance to write to you myself. How can I even begin to thank you for accompanying me through these past two weeks? For walking through them together with me, holding my hand, leading the way when I myself had fallen blind? Your unceasing prayers and expressions of love bolstered my faith in our Great God and His mighty power to turn all my darkness to light.

For though I found myself blind in one eye, I was not overcome by fear, nor did I fall captive to the darkness of discouragement. Indeed, I was surrounded by great peace and true rest the majority of the time. Only let me be very clear that it was His light, His peace, and His rest.

And now the blessed light is returning to my left eye as well, rather much more quickly than we had even hoped. Each day, I see more and feel less disorientation with the disparity in my vision. Yesterday I was able to see color for the first time and read large letters without great strain. The distances are still a blur, but I can identify large objects such as cars and trees easily enough. God has been so gracious to me.

I want you to know that I am absolutely CONVINCED that this experience has come to pass so that God will be praised, so that together our hearts could exalt His name together. “My life is an example to many, because you have been my strength and protection. That is why I can never stop praising You; I declare Your glory all day long. I will tell everyone about Your righteousness. All day long I will proclaim your saving power, for I am overwhelmed by how much you have done for me.” Psalm 71:8, 15

As you praise God with me, please also remember to pray for:

For good rest. I have not been sleeping well for the past week. Mercifully, friends have been helping with the kids and meals this week! After today, Honey will be on school break as well so he will be available to help with our two sweet, redheaded boys.
My continued healing and the ability to know my limits (not a great strength of mine!).
My acceptance of each day, with the vision I have, as a gift from His hand.

I’m so thankful for your part in this miracle!

Touched by the Healer, Touched by You

2009-11-29T01:17:00.001-08:00

Thank you so much to all of you who have tirelessly been praying for me! It is so touching to be so loved by each one of you.

I wanted to let you know that I am indeed seeing some improvement in my vision. On Tuesday, I was completely blind in my left eye. Today, I can see some shadows and shades of gray at short distances. The team of doctors treating me were very encouraged on Friday when they saw the rapid progress I had made.

I thank God that today is my last intravenous treatment, and that I will now be taking three weeks of a much lower dose oral treatment which should have very few side effects. We are looking forward to getting home sometime this coming week but will return in a few weeks to see the Dr.

If you would like to pray for me specifically today, you can ask our loving and gracious Father to help me focus on each day as it comes. Right now, two weeks from now, or even tomorrow is just too overwhelming to think about. One thing I do know is that His grace is sufficient FOR TODAY! So pray I will dwell there.

You can also pray for the process of regaining sight. We are so thankful for any improvement, but it seems like the more I see out of that left eye, the more disoriented I become. Pray that I will slow down, be gracious with myself and not expect too much and also that I will not be fearful in public when there is much noise and activity surrounding me.

God is so gracious and kind, and His love has been poured out upon us. We are truly grateful to Him and to each one of you for your part in carrying us through this journey. You are very loved.

The Gift of Lost Sight

2009-11-25T11:50:00.001-08:00

Last Thursday, I began to lose sight in my left eye. It just so happened an eye doctor was in our little town for three days. I saw him that day. And then the next day, when my sight deteriorated further. And again the next day when the darkness continued to creep in. It was nothing to worry about…just a little inflammation. No work was allowed, just rest and a drop in the eye.

Somewhere in one of the quiet moments of rest, the Lord planted a seed in my heart. “This is a gift,” was all He said. No explanation. No pretty package portraying what kind of flower would bloom from this seed He had carefully buried in my heart.

And then, the gift was everywhere. It was the sweet things I saw with my right eye. A smile. My husband working tirelessly. My sister-in-love laying on the bed with me to talk. It was the sweet things I heard. The laugh of two sweet redheaded boys, a prayer said over me, text messages pouring in from concerned friends. And it was what I felt. Blessed for the chance to slow down and appreciate all I have been given.

By Sunday afternoon, my eye sight had continued to deteriorate. We packed up the house and prepared to head to the capital for a second opinion. Friends were already praying, making appointments, and providing a safe and loving place for my children to land.

And the gift was love. Always much love.

Monday. Oh, how long ago it seems. We arrived to the capital in amazing time considering the fact that the drive shaft dropped out of our car a short way into the journey. A friend quickly loaned us his car and we arrived, dropped the kids off to a saint of a woman, and made our way to the clinic.

The appointment with the ophthalmologist led to an MRI. What at first seemed like wild video game noises, led to a migraine and tears, but still…this was a gift, right?

Yesterday, how strange it seems to type that word for it could have as well been a year ago, I awoke to complete loss of vision in my left eye. I noticed that when the light flicked off, a strange desperation filled my heart to flick it back on as soon as possible. A bit of fear finally settled in my heart. Tears waiting to fall, I opened to the Words of Life. “For when our sufferings increase, so does our consolation.”

This time the gift looked a bit less becoming, more foreign to my eyes, for the gift was suffering, a greater chance to know the immeasurable depth of His consolation.

Calmed, we headed out for another day of pokes and prods and questions. Our attending physician speaks perfect English, strange comfort since I feel at home in Spanish, and the other is a world-renowned Retinologist.

“I can’t promise you that you will regain any sight, but we must act quickly to protect the other eye,” they warned stoically. Prepared to receive a diagnosis of a virus or even MS, I had not allowed myself to entertain the notion of the permanent loss of my sight.

That of course, is still to be determined. The door is not shut. For in these days, the Lord God of the universe has at His step another persistent widow. She bears the face and speaks with the voice of a thousand friends around the world, unceasingly begging for grace and peace and if it would please Him, the restoration of sight.

I too pray. Mostly, mostly for the ability to see the Gift. To accept whatever should fall from His hand as something beautiful and perfectly chosen for me, be it blindness total or partial, be it complete healing and a life much unchanged. And I pray that this tender green shoot of faith, which I hold onto for dear life, will be a gift back to Him as well. For there is no offering too large to be placed on His altar, especially the altar that birthed the Gospel, of which we came to speak.

Currently, I am undergoing a series of high dose intravenous treatments. After but one night hospitalized, I was allowed to come to be with my family, to wade through these murky waters together. I would be a fool to deny that we feel the threat of flood, but we are not afraid for we hear His voice echoing, even in the unknown closets of our hearts, “when you walk through the flood, I will be there.”

And that, for today, is the gift

I will likely be unable to post regularly for some time. Even now, this is a stolen moment, a forbidden one, but I had words which needed escape. I hope God will speak to you through them and that you too will take on the face and the voice of the persistent widow on my behalf!

Dressing Your Thanksgiving Table

2009-11-18T08:22:00.000-08:00

Are you a busy mom who needs some simple and doable ideas for making your Thanksgiving Table beautiful? Head here to check out a few of my favorites!

photo:mhi

He’s My Home

2009-11-16T08:35:00.001-08:00

We had just moved again. Tearfully saying goodbye to a beautiful season of ministry, I was propelled into another unwelcomed one. For the first time in my life, I was somewhere I didn’t want to be. I was hanging onto my calling to missions, but only loosely. My hand limp, I cried weakly, “God, I can’t do this. It’s too much, this missionary life; this inevitable, unstoppable series of moves from one place to another.”

In the darkest and loneliest season of my life, I wanted only one thing. I wanted to go home. Except we couldn’t. So my cries of inadequacy were quieted only when I sat down with my Bible. One day in that fleeting quietness, I reached Psalm 90: 1, “Lord, through all the generations you have been our home!” Tears streaming down my face, dotting the page, I could not move my eyes from that word. Home. It wasn’t a place 3,000 miles away, it was a person. It was Him.

Slowly over the course of the next few days, I was able to identify what home meant to me, release it and delight in the perfection of my new Home.

I started out by declaring that I wanted to live in the same house on the same street for the rest of my life. No more moves. No more suitcases.

He gently corrected me. What I really wanted wasn’t a white house on Main Street, but Him. “Child, the stability you crave is only found in me! I am the eternal, incorruptible Lord. I do not change! I’m the same yesterday, today and forever. I am your home.”

Then I explained that I wanted to be one of the belongers, to have my name written in the collective story, the shared history of a people. No more wondering how I fit. No more being an outsider.

He spoke back, “Have you forgotten? You are already one of the belongers. I chose you before the foundation of the earth. I wrote your name in the epic of the redeemed with My own Son’s blood. You’re not an outsider! You’re accepted in the Beloved and seated at My right hand forever. I am your home.”

Finally, I confessed my longing for deep, meaningful relationships. Friendships that would allow me to barge through the front door with barely a knock, plop down on the couch and tell my truth without fear. Ties unthreatened by the brokenness of my humanity, ties unadulterated by judgment. No more being weighed in the balance. No more exhausting guardedness.

This time He whispered. “Child,” he said, “this freedom to barge into an earthly den and be met with open arms? It’s only a shadow. I am the fulfillment, the One casting that shadow. You have free access to Me through the Spirit! I welcome you to pour out your heart boldly and frankly, though you are broken and naked and lacking. There is no condemnation for you at this throne. Only grace. I am your home.”

It’s been seven years (and as many moves) since the light of Home shined hope into that dark season of my life. Still, I have much to learn about this exchange of temporal for eternal, of seen for unseen, of the shadow for the fulfillment. How thankful I am that the Spirit faithfully directs me Home to the One who satisfies my every longing.

“That something we long for, whether it be an island in the west or the other side of a mountain or perhaps a schooner yacht, long for it in the belief that it will mean joy, which it never fully does, because what we are really longing for is God.” --Sheldon VanAuken, A Severe Mercy

Looking Unto Jesus and Nothing Else

2009-11-15T03:00:00.000-08:00

"Looking Unto Jesus

and at nothing else,

to fix our gaze upon Him,

and to turn it away from everything else."

Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monod by Helen Willis

Photo: TouTouke

What’s Different – They Ride Bicycles

2009-11-11T14:24:00.001-08:00

One of the things that makes my new home so charming, is that elderly people (and people of all ages) ride their bicycles around town.

Every time I see that one of them meandering along, I’m transported to a more wholesome era. An era when people took time to enjoy enjoy a scenic ride to the grocery store, to wave and call out a greeting to their neighbor. It’s very Old Europe and I love it!

And yes, they do have baskets on their bikes. Is it strange that I love that so much? :)

Photo: All Posters

Looking Unto Jesus – the Author and the Finisher

2009-11-08T07:44:00.001-08:00

“Looking unto Jesus,

the author and the Finisher of our faith:

He Who is its pattern and its source,

even as He is its object;

so that by Him our faith may be inspired,

encouraged,

sustained,

and led on to its supreme consummation.”

If you haven’t already, be sure to enter the My Two Favorite Things Giveaway by tonight!

Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monod by Helen Willis

Photo: nathanpaw

An Empty Shampoo Bottle

2009-11-06T04:12:00.001-08:00

It might not mean that much to you, an empty shampoo bottle. To me, it’s a sweet comfort. A little reminder that we’ve been in ONE place for three and a half months now.

Before we arrived to the Chaco of Paraguay, we had lived in five different locations in the course of 14 months. Most of those places kept with them a partially used shampoo bottle, evidence that we had passed through.

Don’t feel sorry for me though. While I would PREFER to live in the same house for the rest of my life, it’s not an all consuming desire like it used to be. Now I know that my Home travels with me, or I should say, I travel with Him.

Still, I thank God for the small comforts He offers me in my flawed humanity, things like squeezing that last little bit of shampoo out for one more wash.

Don’t miss My Two Favorite Things Giveaway! You have until Sunday night to enter!
Photo: contrapart

Two of My Favorite Things for You!

2009-11-05T02:38:00.000-08:00

I'm excited to share two of my favorite things with one blessed reader through a little giveaway! Unlike many giveaways, this one IS OPEN TO INTERNATIONAL READERS as a shout out to all my missionary sisters around the world!

One pound of coffee beans

and...

a digital subscription to Country Living Magazine through Zinio.

I was thrilled to find Zinio since I was unable to afford the overseas subscription to my magazine! I hope you will enjoy it too!

The giveaway is open until Sunday night, November 15th at midnight PST. You can win one entry for each of the following:

1. Leaving a lovely comment telling me what you are most thankful for today

2. Becoming a follower or subscribing in a reader OR already being a follower/subscriber.

3. Posting about the Two of My Favorite Things Giveaway on your blog

Please leave a separate comment for each entry. Good luck everyone and thanks for being such wonderful readers! Hugs from Paraguay!

****If you have a mailing address in the continental US, you can choose to forgo the coffee beans for the paper version of Country Living if you prefer.****

Photos: jellyeater
Country Living

What’s Different – The Food’s From Around Here

2009-11-04T07:16:00.001-08:00

One of the neat benefits of living here in Paraguay is that we live very close to our food source. Everything from our milk products, to our peanut butter, to our dried beans, to our bread and even some of our fruits and vegetables come from within a half hour drive of our house. Our supermarket also sells homemade pasta, home canned pickles and locally made pastries.

My eggs come from a neighbor down the road and it floors me how H.U.G.E. they are!

We eat quite healthy when we are living abroad because we don’t eat pre-packaged, processed, preservative laden foods. Convenience foods are virtually non existent and canned foods are very expensive. A can of tuna, for instance, can cost you $2.00 (as compared to 33 cents in the US). A small 8 oz can of black beans costs $1.50 here (as compared to $.49 for a 16 oz can in the US). So we cook the old fashioned way, which I enjoy and which really tastes amazing, even though it takes a lot more planning ahead!

Living Without Target

2009-11-01T13:50:00.000-08:00

Living without Target and JoAnn's Fabric can be a good thing. Don't believe it? Head over to Missionary Moms and read about how it changed me.

Photo: Pottery Barn

Looking Unto Jesus to Forget Ourselves

2009-11-01T11:10:00.000-08:00

"Looking unto Jesus

to go forth from ourselves

and to forget ourselves;

so that our darkness may flee away

before the brightness of His face."

Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monrod by Helen Willis
Photo: jazza

The Stench of Paint Thinner and Guilt

2009-10-29T08:06:00.000-07:00

They’ve been piled on top of the dryer for a month now, the turquoise tee that's just my color and my last pair of comfortable jeans. They speak to me every time I put in a load of wash, “It’s not that hard. Just get out the paint thinner and take our stains away!” But I drowned out their accusing whispers.

“Hush,” I say. “I’ll deal with you when I want to. I hate the smell of paint thinner!” So there they sit, reminding me of my own selfishness, my embarrassment at my lack of gumption, my shame that I even went so far as to pick up two pairs of thrift store pants to avoid them.

Still, yesterday their cries were louder and more haunting. I can't get them out of my ears. “Doing all you can to avoid what stinks? You know that what stinks worst of all is inside of you!”

“Hush, hush! Let me be!” I cry, but I fall to my knees, broken. Humbled. It’s true. There are piles of stained laundry in my heart. Some might call them filthy rags. The cleanser is there, but I don’t want to smell the stink of the revelation, to feel the ache of the process of change.

I don’t, but I do. My new man fights with my old man. “Be new!” “It’s not worth it!” “It’s been accomplished already” “Lies! The cost will be too great!” Back and forth, back and forth they alternately whisper and scream, offering peace then stealing joy.

So I run to the only place I know to silence the struggle. To truth. To Him. I need to hear His voice. Desperately.

He speaks. “You did right to barge into My presence. Just think how My son’s blood has purified your heart so that you can worship Me. His blood has made you clean. You are perfect forever, even though you are still being made holy! ”

Unlike the stink of paint thinner, His perfect cleansing is sweet and soothing because it carries with it no condemnation. It’s devoid of the acrid, disdainful stench of guilt. The smell that I had feared so much wasn't the cleanser at all, it was my own guilt.

When you've been made perfect, there's no need to fear being made holy.

Scripture: Hebrews 9:14, 10:2, 14, 19-22

What's Different - Tea Time (Tereré)

2009-10-28T04:43:00.000-07:00

Every day at 9 in the morning and 3 in the afternoon, the people of Paraguay take a collective pause for tea. This tea is called Tereré (te-re-ray) and is made from yerba maté (Yerba ma-tay) which is a species of holly.

Everywhere you go, people carry with them a water thermos and their tea supplies. It's the equivalent of the latte in American culture.

There is quite a rich culture surrounding this tea, the most important of which is the invitation to and solidification of friendship. Paraguayans are extremely friendly and accepting.

The tea is served out of a guampa (gwam-pa) and taken through a bombilla (bom-bee-ya) which is a metal straw with a strainer at the end of it. The host fills the guampa with tea, then nestles the bombilla down to the bottom. Water is poured over the tea and taken through the bombilla. You should drink until the tea "talks" or makes a little slurp as it is considered uncouth to leave water in the guampa.

The server (normally the host) takes the first drink because the tea is somewhat bitter in the beginning. After that, if there is a person of importance present, they would receive the second drink, followed by the next person in clockwise fashion. If you didn't already catch on, everyone shares the same cup and straw!

It is considered rude to refuse the tea when it is offered. Remember, it's not just a tea, it is a sign of friendship. After two or three rounds, you can finish without giving offense. A simple "gracias" lets the server know that you are through and he will skip you through the rest of the visit.

Traditionally, tereré is not mixed with food, though certain sectors of the culture do regularly eat a snack with their tea. We were advised that it is good to eat a little snack just before you drink Tereré to give a "shelf" for the tea "to rest on" in your stomach. Tereré should never, ever be mixed with watermelon - though I haven't been able to find out exactly why that is! :)

While 9am and 3pm are the "recognized" times, there's never a bad time for a tea break, especially in this hot climate! I personally find Tereré refreshing, especially when enjoyed in the company of good friends!

A Touch of Fall in the Middle of Spring

2009-10-26T11:59:00.000-07:00

Down here in Paraguay we are in the middle of Spring. However, I have to confess that I have been a bit of a rebel today and done some fall decorating! :) After spending so much of my life in northern hemisphere, it almost seems like a betrayal to not put out some sort of fall decorations during October and November!

So today I gathered up the pumpkins I have been buying whenever I find one of a good shape, along with some forgotten pot stands from the yard, and some beautiful orange berries from one of our trees. Here's the result!

Looking Unto Jesus For the Task for Each Day

2009-10-25T07:30:00.000-07:00

Looking Unto Jesus to receive from Him

the task for each day,

with the grace which is sufficient to accomplish the task;

the grace that enables us to be

patient with His patience,

active with His activity,

loving with His love.

Looking Unto Jesus Translated from the French of Theodore Monrod by Helen Willis

Photo: Allposters.com

Hospitality at the Zoo

2009-10-22T07:04:00.000-07:00

Every once in awhile, you get a glimpse of how God has changed you. For me that glimpse came last night.

Busy, crazy day. Clap much too loud for Darling Little Redhead at his end of school program. Grocery shopping. In and out of the car with one functioning door. Lunch, naps, and "what? the groceries still aren't put away?". Off to a friends for tea. Hurry home to start dinner for company. Realize I have a text message saying nephew is in the hospital for an emergency appendectomy. Kick into overdrive making phone calls and sending emails. Hubby picks up other two nephews and niece.

Chop, chop, dice, dice. Stir fry ready to hit the pan. Put kids to work making lemonade and setting the table so they don't worry about their brother. Company arrives. Sit down and enjoy scrumptious Teriyaki ribs. Power goes out halfway through serving dessert. There are officially two usable candles in the house. We laugh. "Oh well. That's the stuff memories are made of, right?" Nephew 2 starts an asthma attack so he and hubby run home to get inhaler. Guest washes dishes in the dark while I put food away. Hubby and Nephew 2 return.

Nephew 1 comes through surgery fine. "Praise God!" Parents at home while grandparents with Nephew 1 in hospital. Hubby runs kids back home. Power returns. Visit with our guests for a bit before Hubby runs them home. Call it a night.

Are you getting the sense that things were rather a zoo at my house last night? And yet, I was surprised that the chaos didn't settle down into my heart. Granted, I was a bit distracted and my nephew had to ask for the lemons four times, but I wasn't franticly worried about how it would all turn out or if I had enough food for everyone. Strangely enough, I was happy (though obviously concerned for my nephew) and at rest.

And that's where the glimpse of growth came. I used to be so worried about perfection and everything being just so, that I missed the joy of just BEING with our guests. I rarely let people help and often was snappy with my hubby right up until the moment company arrived when I pulled out Little Miss Perfect. Hospitality back then was at the expense of the peace of my home.

What freedom there is in recognizing that we are imperfect and yet, God can redeem all our chaos and bless us...and hopefully make us a blessing as well. I'm not saying Little Miss Perfect never rears her ugly head...but thanks to His grace there is usually true hospitality...even at the Zoo.

Photo: Blue Skies Inn

What's Different - Um Hmm...Do we have to talk about this?

2009-10-21T18:05:00.000-07:00

One of the things that is probably the hardest for North American's to get used to is having to throw your TP into the trash can, instead of into the toilet. For us, the idea is just, well, gross. But believe me, it is much better than a backed up toilet which is what can happen if you put the TP into the toilet as the plumbing system is not designed to handle TP (small pipes). Enough said.

Photo: nkzs

Toward a More Inspiring Work Space

2009-10-20T16:46:00.000-07:00

My desk is a dresser/vanity that came with the house. I didn't really enjoy looking at myself as I typed, so I set out to see what I could do about that! This project did not cost me one cent because I challenged myself to use only items that I already had.

First I covered the mirror with some burlap. Then I put out my birthday lamps from last year and some other odds and ends I had made. And this is how it stayed for about a week.

Then today, I finally got around to putting up some pictures and momentos. Every single thing has a memory tied to it! If you didn't already know that I'm sentimental...you're about to find out! A plaque with my favorite verse was a recent gift from a friend, birthday card from my parents, watercolor of a store we visited on our honeymoon...everything has a story. When something catches my eye while I am working, it brings a smile to my face! One feature you can't see well in this photo is that I hung clothes pins and the put stacks of my favorite photos in them so I can change them regularly.

This mirror was a steal from my birthday last year...Honey took me to Farm Chicks! It was wonderful!

The center of this flower is a token from the El train in Philadelphia, PA which Honey and I rode on one of our first dates.

This thread is the most worthless stuff I have ever encountered in my life for sewing, so I figured it might as well be put to use somewhere else! :)

This baby necklace has a tiny mustard seed in it and was given to my grandmother, by my great great grandmother, when she was pregnant with my dad. My great great grandmother was just sure my dad was going to be a girl! :) It also has this verse inscribed on it.

I definitely enjoy sitting down to work a lot more now! :) Does your work space make you smile? What could you do to make it more inspiring?

Looking Unto Jesus Who Gives Repentance

2009-10-18T09:37:00.000-07:00

Looking Unto Jesus

who gives repentance

as well as forgiveness of sins

because He gives us the grace to recognize,
to deplore,

to confess,

and to forsake our transgressions.

Looking Unto Jesus translated from the French of Theodore Monrod by Helen Willis

Photo: kajrdj

What's Different - Greetings

2009-10-14T13:30:00.000-07:00

Here in Paraguay greetings are a little different! The first time you meet someone, you shake hands. Generally, after that, you would give that person a kiss on each cheek.

Here are the rules (as I understand them):

Man to man - shake hands or hug if a close friend

Woman to man - man waits for women to lean in, then he knows it is ok to give the kiss greeting. If woman is uncomfortable for whatever reason, she offers her hand instead. Normally, however, here is no problem with giving the kiss greeting to a man.

Woman to woman - a kiss on each cheek

Dignitaries or other important people - shake hands to show respect

It's also important to greet everyone in the room when you enter. North Americans are notorious for entering a room and just giving a "hey, howdy, hey!" to everyone. That is considered very rude to a Latin. Here you enter a room, and go around the room greeting each person. When you depart from a gathering, you should generally also say goodbye to everyone individually. The handshake or kiss is repeated at departure.

The population of the Paraguayan Chaco where we live is about one half Mennonites. I just found out that they greet each other with a handshake or a hug if they are close friends. Oops! I had been giving the kiss greeting for about two months! Obviously being Paraguayans they are familiar with the kiss greeting so as far as I understand it wasn't offensive, just not the way they normally do it.

As a side note, Honey and I found it difficult when we were home in the US last year to remember NOT to give the kiss on the cheek at greeting. It's funny how you get so used to one way of doing things, you don't even realize it's become a part of you!

See you next Wednesday for the next installment of What's Different! If there is something specific you are interested in, let me know in the comments! I love comments! :)

Photo:dailymail.co.uk

Looking Unto Jesus Revealed by the Holy Spirit

2009-10-11T08:42:00.000-07:00

"Looking unto Jesus
revealed by the Holy Spirit,

to find in constant communion with Him

the cleansing of our sinstained hearts,

the illumination of our darkened spirits,

the transformation of our rebel wills..."

Looking Unto Jesus, Translated from the French of Theodore Monod by Helen Willis
Photo: PocketAces

Creating Beauty for the Glory of God

2009-10-09T11:35:00.000-07:00

I love to curl up on the couch with a big thick stack of design magazines. I’ll admit it. I love decorating. I used to feel guilty about that and wondered what use it could possibly have on the mission field. It seemed so shallow to think about coordinating fabrics when so many have yet to hear the Gospel message.

Recently, though, I’ve come to a place of contentment and gratitude. The guilt is gone.

To find out why, please visit Missionary Moms where I'm posting for the first time today!

Photo: Country Living

What's Different - Mopping

2009-10-07T12:01:00.000-07:00

The mop in much of South America is a long handled squeegee and a thin absorbent rag. The rag is dipped in the mop water, wrapped around the squeegee, then passed over the floor until it needs rinsed. When you are finished mopping, you wash your mop rag. I personally really like the idea of starting off with a clean mop rag each time, instead of trying to get a mop head clean after each use like we do in the US!

Come back next Wednesday for more What's Different and if you haven't read about the Widow Maker, click here!

Hall Table Makeover

2009-10-06T04:25:00.000-07:00

We purchased this hall table used shortly after we arrived to the country. I loved the bones of it but it needed a little love. So I had the drawer fronts replaced and bought a can of green paint. Then I got a little worried that I was crazy.

Until I saw this coffee table that Kimba built. Then I felt not at all crazy and just a little happy! :)

So somewhere in the ballpark of two months later, I actually got this lovely lady through rehab!

I learned a lot through my first refinishing project! I'm definitely looking forward to painting something again soon. (Honey, if you are reading this...just take a deep breath!)

I'd love to hear what you think! And may I just apologize ahead of time for the dizzying flooring in our rental!

Looking Unto Jesus Glorified

2009-10-04T12:17:00.000-07:00

"Looking Unto Jesus Glorified,

to find in Him our Heavenly advocate

completing by His intercession the work inspired by His loving kindness for our salvation,

who even now is appearing for us before the face of God,

the kindly Priest,

the spotless Victim,

continually bearing the iniquity of our holy things."

Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monod by Helen Willis

Photo: AllPosters.com

What's Different - The Widow Maker

2009-09-30T19:21:00.000-07:00

I'd like to introduce you to what locals call The Widow Maker. My husband refers to it as a Self Electrocution Kit.

We don't have a hot water heater so any water we want to warm has to be heated on demand with one of these fancy contraptions. It's a scary thought to have wires in your shower, believe me! And because we have a high mineral content in our water, I was getting shocked every time I tried to adjust the temperature of the water! Yikes!

Then some experienced missionary told us you can just put some hose on the shower handles and then you won't get shocked. Much better!

Thanks for reading the first installment of What's Different! Come back next Wednesday for more!

I Wish I Could Do More

2009-09-26T10:12:00.000-07:00

I got a letter from a dear friend the other day. She's going through an unspeakable trial. Heart breaking, gut wrenching, wake-you-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night-thinking-about-it kind of a trial.

As I finished reading her letter, I found myself thinking, "I wish I wasn't so far away! I would love to do more than just pray"! You know, take a meal, watch her kids, be there to listen.

But in about one millisecond, the Spirit pressed in on me. It was quite uncomfortable actually.

Ouch. But He was right. It's so much easier for me to bake some cookies, or babysit, than it is to do the work of prayer. Once again, I showed that my knee jerk response is to try to DO something in my own strength.

Prayer wasn't my preferred response because prayer is an act of surrender, of utter dependance. It's proclaiming to God, "This is beyond me, but You are capable!" And I wasn't feeling desperate in that moment, I wanted to DO something to help.

But now, I do feel desperate. Desperate for the deep down soul belief that I NEED to pray and desperate for a behavior that manifests my belief.

"You can do more than pray after you have prayed, but you cannot do more than pray until you have prayed." John Bunyan

How have you grown in your appreciation for and need of prayer? At times like these, I'm so thankful that though I often fail to pray, the Spirit intercedes for me!

Looking Unto Jesus Risen

2009-09-20T10:25:00.000-07:00

"Looking Unto Jesus Risen,

to find in Him the righteousness which alone makes us righteous,

and permits us,

all unworthy as we are,

to draw near with boldness,

in His name,

to Him who is His Father and our Father,

His God and our God."

Looking Unto Jesus translated from the French of Theodore Monrod by Helen Willis

Photo: fbcssiyouth

I Love that Tree

2009-09-16T07:06:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, while driving into town, I almost hit the ditch. Only it wasn't a cattle truck that threatened to run me off the road. It was a mere thought.

"I love that tree!"

Unbidden, it had entered my mind. And just as quickly as I caught my breath, it sank to my heart.

It was different than the, "how lovely!" of a tourist who passes through. But really, why should the sight of the algarroba dotting the countryside knock the wind out of me so?

Because with that simple thought came the overwhelming realization that I was beginning to feel at home. That there was a rightness in my being here. My heart was lifted in praise to the God who is merciful. The One who knows my weakness, and yet chooses to bless me.

I've since decided the algarroba is my tree, my special reminder that I belong here.

What about you? Have you ever been surprised by the overwhelming sense that you belong right where God has you? I'd love to hear about it!

While we're on the topic of trees, click here for a super interesting post about the Bottle Tree of Paraguay!

Looking Unto Jesus Crucified

2009-09-13T12:55:00.000-07:00

"Looking unto Jesus crucified, to find in His shed blood

our randsom,

our pardon,

our peace."

Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monod by Helen Willis

Photo: stock.xchng

Looking Unto Jesus

2009-09-06T11:15:00.000-07:00

"Looking Unto Jesus in the Scriptures,

to learn there what He is,

what He has done,

what He gives,

what He desires;

to find in His character our pattern,

in His teachings our instruction,

in His precepts our law,

in His promises our support,

in His person and in His work a full satisfaction provided for every need of our souls."

What are you looking unto Jesus for today?

Excerpt from Looking Unto Jesus, translated from the French of Theodore Monrod

Photo: Daniel Iggars

I Declared Thursday "Pajama Day"

2009-08-22T11:50:00.000-07:00

It had been a rough week. I was feeling blue and flat. Lacking energy to come up with one more meal. Lacking patience for my precious family. Lacking positivity to be able to respond to the emails awaiting me in my inbox. Lacking interest in decorating projects yet to be completed. Bottom line: all the things that normally make me tick, felt about as desirious to me as eating a piece of cardboard. And that scared me.

So I declared Thursday to be "Pajama Day". A day to sleep in and hang out in my pajamas until noon. A day to forget my laundry, and allay any guilt for feeding my son chocolate bombs for breakfast. A day to read as many decorating blogs as I wanted and watch a girly movie. It sounded really good to me.

And the truth is, it FELT really good to let go of all the work and expectations for one day and just enjoy myself. At least along until about 1:00.

I was taking a long, hot shower, congratulating myself on the wisdom of my Pajama Day Declaration. And then, He spoke.

Everything slowed, my heart dropped, and I was rebuked. I was no different than Adam and Eve who sewed clothes out of leaves, or the children of Israel who built the golden calf. I was looking for my own redemption. Trying to figure things out on my own. Trying to fix it in my own strength.

But just as soon as my disappointment started to rise, He spoke again. This time, with familiar comforting grace.

So then and there, I rested. I truly rested. Pajama Day was redeemed. Not by me, by Him. By the One who interrupts my feable attempts to rescue myself with His voice, with His truth, with His rest.

Have you been dreaming of your own "Pajama Day"? Oh, you might call it something different, but are you longing for an escape from the mess of your life? For something to bring you alive again?

I'm here to encourage you to look deeper, to look behind "Pajama Day" and see what you are really longing for. I bet it's redemptive rest and it's only found in Him.

"I suspected that all the yearnings for I knew not what that I had ever felt - were in truth yearnings for him. For God. I yearned towards Him." Sheldon VanAuken, A Severe Mercy

Nuestro Refugio en Paraguay

2009-08-11T10:29:00.000-07:00

Welcome to My Place of Peace, now broadcasting from our new HOME in Paraguay! So glad you're here!

My vision for our home here was "Farmhouse Revival" and I repurposed lots of beautiful salvage from this barn. So much, in fact, that my husband was overheard muttering, "You don't have to repurpose everything in the barn, dear".

The view from my kitchen window

Beautiful light filters into our bedroom when the shutters are open. Yes, we actually have functioning shutters!

This project cost less than $1 for supplies but delivers major impact

Quite possibly my favorite piece of art ever

The laundry room was really dark because the ceiling is very low so we lightened it up with a few coats of paint.

I have always really enjoyed laundry, but never so much as now! It's wonderful to have a beautiful space, especially I spend a lot of time in the laundry room! :)

These plates have been from the US, to Venezuela, back to the US and now to Paraguay. So pretty.

The kitchen has very little counter space (or storage for that matter), so we changed this freestanding cabinet into an island. Lots of thanks to honey for going forward with the project even though he was skeptical!

I think she turned out beautiful, don't you? The extra counter space is a life saver and honey wired the island with 110 so I can run my kitchen aid too!

Ode to a math teacher (and all his patience as he painted, fixed and hung pictures!). Love you, honey!

I fell in love with this dining room table, but didn't think we would be able to get it. Honey surprised me on our anniversary with the news we could! It seats 10 easily. Come on down for a home cooked meal!

Special thanks to my friend Jen for coming to the rescue with a fabric that would make my brown and yellow swirl tile look good! :)

Bathroom Before. If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. :)

And after. Much better! Guess where the old bicycle basket in the window came from? :)

Thanks so much for coming on a little tour of our new home. Even though it is a one year rental, it's so important to be surrounded by beauty and feel at home! Leave me a comment and let me know what you think! :)

I Should...

2009-07-16T11:48:00.001-07:00

Do you have a list of things in your mind, that you SHOULD be doing at this very moment? Maybe it's folding the laundry, maybe it's starting dinner. As women, we tend to be real doers. We don't slow down very often...and when we do, we feel guilty about all we could be accomplishing.

Today I SHOULD be packing. But instead, I've been holding my baby, and sitting down to visit with family. And strangely enough, I don't feel guilty. I wonder if I'm finally believing the message I've been preaching to myself for so long. The message that says I SHOULD be still and listen, that I SHOULD slow down and enjoy.

No doubt the battle in my mind will be on again tomorrow. But for today, it's laid to rest and I'm thankful.

The Legend of Nanduti

2009-07-12T15:27:00.000-07:00

Like most beautiful things, Nanduti is said to have been born out of love...

Two young men loved the Cacique's (Chief's) daughter. While he alone determined her destiny, he loved his daughter and desired her happiness. He devised a contest that would be sure to show which young man would be best suited to marry his daughter. Each one must bring a gift. But not just any gift. A unique gift. One that would cause the Cacique to release his daughter to marriage.

One young man was very rich, and there was nothing he could not buy. He gathered every kind of animal and prepared them to be taken to the Cacique.

But the other young man was beyond poor (you knew it would be so, surely). He had nothing, and no way to buy anything for his beloved. As he wandered through the woods, he looked up and saw an elaborate spider web hanging from a branch. He thought to himself, "How perfect! I will take this as my gift!" But as he reached up to grab it, it disolved in his hands. He left the forest weeping, completely defeated.

His mother heard his cries and found him. As he poured out his dilemma, she assured him that all would be well. She found another spider web and sat down to mimic it's pattern and create her own beautiful web. Using the hair from her own head, a stunning salt and pepper, she weaved the first nanduti.

When the poor young man presented his gift, the Cacique gave his daughter to him. Since that day women all over Paraguay have been creating nanduti out of lovely colored thread.

Nanduti means web in Guarani, one of Paraguay's two official languages.

Understanding Doesn't Equal Exemption

2009-07-10T06:52:00.000-07:00

It's begun. Culture stress. The inevitable process of adapting to and becoming part of another culture. And yes, it is inevitable. Even if you've lived in another culture previously. Even if you are walking with Jesus daily. As long as you are human, you will partake of this process as you integrate into another culture.

But that doesn't mean it's always a welcome process. I have found in the missionary community, there is a lot of acceptance of culture shock and culture stress, as long as we are not the ones experiencing it. But we tend to be very demanding of ourselves and believe that we shouldn't experience this natural and necessary process.

For me, this stems from the misbelief that if we UNDERSTAND a process, we somehow believe ourselves to be EXEMPT from the effects of said process. Do we really educate ourselves on culture stress to prepare ourselves to walk through it...or deep down is it in hopes we can avoid it all together (wouldn't that be nice!)?

To all my missionary friends out there, my deepest desire for you today is that you would accept the grace that is there for you as you go through this process (and it can take years), that you would stop begrudging yourselves for experiencing it! You are a beautiful creation of His and as painful as it sometimes is...He designed you to adapt, with His grace and by His power at work in you!

I encourage anyone who is a missionary or who loves missionaries to click here for a brief description of culture stress. I found it a helpful reminder.

We've Got Wheels

2009-07-06T08:22:00.000-07:00

We are so thankful for the Lord's provision of a 95 Mitsubishi Delica 4x4 van. THANK YOU to everyone who gave so generously to this project!

It's hard to believe we have been here for 3 weeks already. Our orientation is going really well and we are enjoying it, though I confess I'm starting to feel VERY anxious to get settled in our home up north. It's always hard to be in limbo, but my longings for a home of our own bring me back to the sufficiency of my REAL HOME.

Historic Asuncion

2009-07-05T05:36:00.000-07:00

With Cacique (Chief) Lambare, who is known for opposing the Spanish rule of Paraguay. His monument is at the highest point in Asuncion.

The oldest Cathedral in Asuncion, over 450 years old (though it was demolished and reconstructed in 1842).

Right next to the Cathedral is the Catholic University. The brick work is beautiful on this building. I adore all the columns and arches, don't you?!

This is the President's Office. He actually resides in another location. This lovely estate was built by the first President, Carlos Antonio Lopez, as a private residence for his son, Mariscal Lopez (who suceeded him in the presidency). Later it was turned over to the government.

This week I hope to get out to Mariscal Lopez street to take some pictures for you of the fabulous mansions! Their architecture is so spectacular! And across from the American Embassy there is a house build as a replica of the the house in Gone with the Wind! I'll be sure to get a picture of that one for you! :) Come back soon!

7 Years...

2009-06-29T19:10:00.001-07:00

Happy 7th Anniversary, My Love!

It's been an incomparable journey so far and we've only just begun...

Destination: Paraguay

2009-06-22T11:21:00.000-07:00

We made it to Paraguay! Thanks so much for your prayers. We were delayed overnight in Brazil, but that was a total blessing in disguise because we arrived a little more rested (they put us up in a little hostel where we slept for about six hours).

We were met at the airport in Asuncion by Honey's sister and family, our Paraguayan host family along with our host church's pastor and wife, as well as a representative from our mission.

Here are a few pictures from our first week here:

Making Mbeyu, a Paraguayan cheese pancake typically enjoyed during the month of June.

The finished product, which strangely enough tasted like macaroni and cheese to me! :)

Coffee comes with sugar already mixed in here!

The basket of food our host church prepared for us - so sweet and generous!

This brand of paper products has a bit of a superiority complex, wouldn't you say? :)

Exhausted but Awake

2009-06-14T21:27:00.000-07:00

If you're reading this on Monday, June 15th, please say a prayer for us as we fly to Paraguay! It's pretty much a 24 hour deal for us...getting up at 2 am (well, I might just stay up since it's 12:30am and I haven't gone to bed yet) and getting in about midnight, but then we will need to go through customs, load luggage, etc.

Please pray that we will all be able to sleep on the plane, that our attitudes will reflect our love for the Savior we long to share with the people of Paraguay and for all the adjustments that being when we touch down in our new host country. I'm so glad we know Spanish already and don't have to worry about that detail! :)

Many blessings on you, my friends! Thanks for taking time to care about my sweet family!

Four Days to Take Off

2009-06-11T13:17:00.000-07:00

The boys are both sleeping so I thought I would update you...we are FOUR DAYS from our departure to Paraguay!

What I'm doing: Emptying cupboards and closets, cleaning as I go. Confirmed today that we get 70 pound suitcases. YES!

What I have left to do: Target run, scan pictures, sort some paperwork, love up on my hubby and kiddos, write thank you notes (that might have to wait until we get to Paraguay...wouldn't people love to get a Paraguayan stamp? I might console myself with the thought!)

What I'm feeling: At the moment, I'm excited to get there and get settled. I'm not going to think about the fact that we will be in the country for a month before we can actually get settled.

What I'm learning: Last week my honey said something in his message which really cut to my heart, "Anything you put above God in your life is an idol". The Spirit convicted me that I have been putting my desire for permanent housing situation and a life without moves above my desire for Him.

Then yesterday, I read this verse, "Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs." Now, I don't have a ton of time to delve into the context at the moment, but to me it was a WOW moment. When I allow my desires to occupy more of my mental energy than my desire for God, I miss out on the grace that He longs to give me. I can take that idol and give it to Him and trust Him to give me the grace to deal with my life at the moment. If it will bless Him to give me a more permanent home on this earth...awesome...but until then, I choose to lay those desires at His feet and be met by Him in my moments of longing. After all, He's my REAL HOME!

How you can pray for me: A wise use of time, energy, and a Spirit filled heart (kindness, patience, joy in the midst of it all).